


Green-Apple Eyes

by Casgotmytongue



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-03-28 11:56:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 24,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13903521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casgotmytongue/pseuds/Casgotmytongue
Summary: I stand up and brush off my clothes, noticing new tears on my already worn out jeans. I look around trying not to look too much at the attractive person upfront of me because there was a big chance I would pass out. The guy then leans over to try to meet my face.I finally give up and decide to get over the possibility of fainting from seeing him and face him. There’s silence as he looks at me and I look back at those sparkling green eyes, I feel hear rise to my cheeks. He leans down and gathers my books and gets back up and hands them to me“Well Cas, my names Dean Winchester.”





	1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1: It’s the end of senior year of highschool and I don’t know what to do with myself. I was always the kid that was usually by himself, but other than myself I was always with my best friend,Dean. Dean’s another senior with bright green eyes and short brown hair, with his usual brown leather jacket and black boots. I walk through these halls, this world. Everyone else seems to have their lives planned out while I’m floatinf around in this big ocean,drowning. I guess I was one of those fish that’s slowly dying because I was born without gills. My name is Castiel or really Cas for short.

 

“BEEP BEEP BEEP”

I groan as I gain the strength to drag my arm from under the pillow and tap on the lit up dismiss button on my phone screen. I desperately didn’t want to get out of bed, but knowing it’s all almost over helps, and if my mom’s boyfriend,John, finds me still here, well you don’t want to know. I get out the bed and go to the dresser to pull out a long sleeve blue shirt and a pair of jeans I have which has gathered holes in its material from years of being worn.” I go to the bathroom and take my shirt off. I look into the mirror and see the many scars that cover my body. 

 

Flashback~

The school bell rung and all the kids run out of the classrooms, I get bumped into a few times along the walk and finally head out the front doors and make my way down the street. I shiver as I walk alone and pull my jacket closer around and grip my fingers tighter around my books. The street is silent and all I can hear is the faint sound of leaves gliding across the street in the wind, a sharp pain enters my back and I tumble to the ground along with my books slipping out of my hands. I hear laughter.

 

“Watch your step loser.”

 

I turn my head to find the school bully, Chase, with his gym shorts and polo along with his medium legthed red hair, he looks down at me and his mouth curls into a devilish smile. Footsteps follow as his gang surrounds him and I. It’s now just me against him and his three minions.

 

“Haha yeah loser watch your step!” One says

Chase signs and whips his head to the minion

“I just said that idiot!”

Chase gets up and begins to bicker with his friend and I Look up and see my house right down the road, in plain sight. Maybe this is my chance to get away. I quietly stack my books up into my arms while glancing at Chance and his minions every second, my heart beats as I think of what could happen if they catch me and knowing that it will be worse then what they were planning on doing before, but there’s still a chance they won’t even catch me. Before my mind could give it a second thought, my legs made up their own mind and pushed off the ground and began to spring towards home, the wind whips my black hair around my face as I hear screaming.

 

“Get him!!!” Chance screams 

 

He and the other boys race after me, I glance behind me to see them hot on my trail and I turn around to see home right there, just right there upfront of me. My eyes lower to the ground for a second to see a pothole coming towards me, I tried hopping over it but it wasn’t enough. My body falls to the ground and I roll onto my back, I feel pressure land on top of me and my wrists are gripped and held over my head. It’s Chase.

 

“Hold his arms!” He screams to his friends as I struggle underneath him

 

One of the guys grab my arms and hold them down to the ground over my head.

 

“Awh Cassie, I just wanted to talk, we’re friends, right?” He says with a smirk  
“So before I beat the shit out of you I wanted to you to say hey to your mom for me and that’s if she wants some more, she knows where to find me.” He licks his lips and mimicked a woman’s moan

 

I feel my face heat up with fury and disgust and I spit in his face. Ha mouth drops open in suprise and then turn monstrous with clenched teeth as he looks at me with razor sharp cutting dark eyes and raises his fist, I tilt my head back and close my eyes. The weight on my chest feels lighter all of a sudden and I ease my eyes open to find Cage next to me with fear in his eyes as an unknown figure with a brown leather jacket and jeans with short cropped brown hair grips the collar of Chase’ polo. Whys he so scared? I wonder and then my eyes catch a glimpse of a shiny blade of a pocketknife pointed towards Chase.

 

“Look man, I ain’t gonna do anything..just let me go.”

 

The leather jacketed figure lifts chase up from the ground and leans into his ear. I try to hear what he’s whispering but I can’t hear a thing. I turn toward where the minions were and they are already gone.

 

“You okay?”

 

I look up and meet green eyes and a face filled with what seems to be worry. Holy crap he’s beautiful. I realize I havnt said a thing when he sways a hands upfront of my face

 

“Hey buddy, you there?” He says and smirks  
This brings me back to reality

 

“Uh y-yeah.. and my names not buddy.”

 

I stand up and begin to brush off my clothes, noticing more tears in my jeans. I look around trying not to look too much at the attractive person in front of me because there was a big chance I would pass out. The guy leans over to try to meet my face

 

“Well, then what is your name?” He says with another smirk

I finally just decide to get over the possiblilitu of fainting from seeing him and face him.

 

“It’s-it’s Castiel Novak.”

 

There’s silence as he just looks at me and I look back at those sparkling green eyes. I feel heat rising to my cheeks.

 

He leans down and gathers my books and hands them towards me

 

“Well Cas, My name’s Dean Winchester.”

 

 

 

 

 

F


	2. Chapter 2

Ever since that day, I’ve always been with Dean. We would walk to and from school together, so I was never getting messed much with anymore by Chase and his gang. I would hang out with Dean everyday after school, the only other person at His House was Dean’s little brother Sam and his dad, but his dad was barely there. I tried asking him where his mom was or why his dad was barely there, but he would ignore the questions. We would walk to his house and watch tv while pigging out on junk food or he would cook burgers and other stuff for us, but at night that’s when we would have our fun.

 

“You ready?” Dean asked with a smile and a daring expression 

He really got me out of my shell since I’ve met him, but I’m still still the same person I’ve always am and will be , an awkward, nervous person, but he excepts me for me.

I smiled back

“Heck yeah”

 

Dean opens the door and I follow behind , but he quickly stops and looks back into the house where Sam is doing homework on the couch

 

“Hey Sammy I’ll be back soon, leftovers are in the fridge Kay?”

Sam nods his head while writing some more on his paper

“Yeah Dean. I know the drill.”

 

Dean stands there for a second and then makes a little smile and closes the door,meets me outside. We begin walking down the block and I steal side glances at him and his smile turned to a frown. I decide I wasn’t going to try to pry into what’s wrong because Dean always keeps things to himself, instead I was going to try to get his mind off of it. I hop in front of him and tap on the temple of his head

 

“So what is our famous adventure going to be tonight?” I ask while walking backwards with my hands in my jacket pockets

His frown immediately changes to a smile and then he walks faster catching me by suprise and I quickly jump out the way back to his side so I don’t get toppled

“You’ll see.” His face showing mischievousness  
We make our way into the darkness  
—————————

 

We meet a set of woods and head into it

“Dean, you know where you’re going right.. like I kinda don’t wanna get lost and meet some cannibals tonight-“

Dean makes a little chuckle

“Uh Yeah Cas. I was just planning on serving you right up on a silver platter for some hungry cannibals. We’re you expecting something different?”

“Ha-ha, your SO funny, but seriously please don’t.”

He shakes his head,”I’ll try but can’t promise ya.”

 

We walk for some time through the woods with only Dean’s phone as a flashlight. My hands start getting numb and I dig them deep into my pockets, I feel my legs getting tired from walking for so long while at the same time around huge mud puddles.

“Are we almost there?” I whine

 

He doesn’t answer me. An opening comes to view, we walk a few more steps and meet a high grasses area with a fence that goes far down right and left back through the patch of woods and a big dark building some feet behind it. We walk up to the fence and he starts climbing over it and I began climbing as he lands, out my hand on the fence to start when I notice a sign with big letters 

“PROVATE PROPERTY. TRESPASSERS WILL BE PROSECUTED.”

 

Dean hops from the fence and then turns towards the building, I clear my throat to get his attention and point at the sign.

“Really Dean..”

Dean rolls his eyes and starts walking towards the building

“Yes really.” He calls out while walking away

I look back behind me debating on just leaving right now. This place is freaky and it doesn’t help that there’s a possible chance we’ll get caught trespassing and put into jail or something. I push the thought out of my head, I can’t leave Dean here by himself. I climb over the fence and run after him. We walk side by side to the building and stop at the front of it, it’s a big old building with cracked windows and it’s walls covered in plant vines growing over it along with black stuff which looks to be mold. The front door is chained up and writing is above it,” Metropolis Hospital.” I look back to see Dean climbing through the nearest window, clearing glass along the way and I climb in after him. The interior of the abandoned building is much more freakier looking than the outside, the walls are covered from the floor to the ceiling with graffiti and vines , floors are littered with garbage and files packed with paper. I pick up a file near me and open it to find one of the patients that went here’s private information, diagnosis’. 

 

“I found this place a long time ago.” Dean says while plopping into the old receptionist rolling chair propping his feet up on the desk and arms folded behind his head. I look up and drop the file on a table 

“Don’t tell me you come here by yourself, this place is freaky Dean.”

Dean smirks and chuckles 

 

“This is a pretty big place.. don’t tell me your scared Cas?” He says with a raised eyebrow

I lean back on the desk and fold my arms

“Uh no-ofcourse not.” I say while looking around, I feel a crawling sensation on my hand and the vision of a big terantula crawling on me comes to mind. I yelp and look down to find Dean scraping a feather against it. I grab the feather out his hand and push him out the chair, he falls to the flor and yanks my meg from underneath me making me fall too, I put the feather up to his nose and the guys actually ticklish. We wrestle for a bit back and forth gaining the feather, laughing together. A sound of a chain moving around and a door opening makes us stop and turn around to see a cop shining a flashlight at us.

 

“What you kids dong here? This is private prop-“

He doesn’t get to finish before Dean drags me off the floor with him and we run down the hall. The sound of the cops keys jingle and jangle as he runs after us. We sneak into a janitors closet and quietly close the door, the rooms so small to where it’s hard to breathe. Dean hides next to the door and I sit next to the little sink on the opposite side, the faint jingle of keys start getting louder and I look up to see the shadow of the cops head in the door window and stop. Dean mouths, “ is he still there?” I wait a minute and the cop walks past, I nod, we wait till the sound of the keys grow fainter and fainter and then ease open the door. Dean looks out the crack of the door and then we slide out, we begin quietly walking back down the hallway to the find the front door.

“Hey stop!!”

We run as fast as we’ve ever ran and get out the front door. The cop is still being us as we run across the field to the fence. We meet the fence and Dean jumps on it and quickly climbs over it hopping down to the ground waiting for me,I hop on the fence and get to the top and make a glance back to see the cop very close to the fence. I try to jump down and hear a ripping sound. My shorts stuck to the fence. I try pulling my shirt out the fence wire, it’s not coming off, Dean grabs my hand and just pulls me off the fence with my shirt tearing from my body and hangs onto the fence. We run and run and I step into mud puddles while Dean hops over them like it’s nothing, we’re finally far away from the building and any sight of the cop, we meet the end of the woods and hop into the street. I’m catching my breath before I hear laughing to see Dean bending over laughing so hard pointing at my pants soaked with mud and pieces of my shirt clinging to my shoulders, I begin laughing too but then he stops. I look up to see him staring at the scars on my body with wide eyes. Oh no...I forgot all about those..

 

“Cas..what-who did that to you..” he comes closer and I feel back away feeling shame and embarrassment rising deep in the pits of my stomach, I’m speechless.

“Hey! Who did this to you?!” He grips my face and makes me look at him

I look down and think of what to say, maybe I shouldn’t say anything and just walk away and forget the only friend I have and go back to being completely alone, itleast I won’t have to worry about something seeing me like this.

 

“It’s him isn’t it? Your moms boyfriend?” His face grows angry and I slowly nod.

 

“Jesus Cas-why didn’t you tell me?” He asks, he looks hurt

“How could I tell you this?” I say pointing to my chest.”Why would I want you seeing this, who WOULD want to see this?!” I get angry and begin to walk down the street. I know he’s just worried and ofcourse I would be to after seeing someone body made into a human pin cushion. He runs after me and turns me around.

 

“No your staying with me tonight..”

I hesitate and he grabs my wrist and try’s to drag me away, I stop

“Okay,okay. But I gotta stop by there to get some of my stuff.”  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
We get to my house and Dean sits on the porch while I go pack a bag, I put some clothes into a bag and make sure to get my backpack for school tomorrow, the door cracks open.

“Where do you think your going?”

The air grows cold and fills with the faint smell of whiskey and smoke

“I was just going to stay the night at Deans again..”

He scowls.”Yeah, well you do that too many times and I think you should stay here tonight, so don’t bother packing.”

“ well what does mom think?”  
He grips my shoulder hard causing me to wink

“Your mom will agree with anything that I think is right boy.”

He lets go and blows smoke into my face, walks out the door. I throw my bag onto the floor and go out to the porch and sit next to Dean.

“Well there’s a problem.” I say

“And that problem is?” He asks with a confused face

“He won’t let me go to your place tonight..”

I expect him to say okay, bye and then walk away but he doesn’t 

“Well looks like I’m staying here then doesn’t it? Oh and by the way I need to borrow something to sleep in tonight.” He lifts his collar and smells his shirt and then inside it and makes a face of disqust.”And a shower.”

We go inside to find John and mom sitting on the couch with his arm wrapped around her shoulder, I try to just slip past but mom catches us

“Hey sweetly, you boys going to sleep already?” She asks

“Yeah...goodnight.”

 

We head into my room and I change while Dean gets in the shower. I lie down and turn on the tv, I shouldn’t feel nervous because I’ve stayed the night at Deans plenty of times in his bed but he’d had a bigger bed than me so that means we’ll be a lot closer now. I hear the water shut off and he comes into the room with a towel wrapped around his waist.

 

“Uh Dean-“ I say

He doesn’t seem to understand and plays it’s off,”what?” He asks as he grabs a shirt and pajama pants from my bag on the floor and starts slipping them on, I quickly turn around with my now tomato colored face.

“Nothing-“ 

 

He hops into bed,” night Cas.” And soon there’s snoring. It’s goings to be really hard to ignore this, yeah the snoring ofcourse but what I was really talking about was my feelings for my best friend because I really really like Dean and he can never know this.

End of flashback~

 

I close my eyes for a second remembering those memories that bring me happiness, but Dean finding out about my abuse does not. I hop into the shower and pull on a shirt and pants along with my bag and shove my phone into my back pocket, time to go.


	3. Chapter 3

I walked ot my room and started down the hallway passing my mom and John passed out on the couch with the tv on static, bottles litter the floor around it. I growl and walk out the door, just something else I have to clean up later, I get in my car and turn the key.nothing.  
“Dammit..”  
I pop the hood and get out to circle around to the front, look at all the wires and other mechanics in it , I know nothing about cars. I would use another vehicle but the The only other vehicle home is John’s and he would never let me borrow his truck, says I’m not “worthy of driving in such a thing” pssh, like that guy has anything to do with the word “worthy”. Mom doesn’t have a car, I mean she did before John when she was with dad, she used to be strong and her and dad lived eackother, they were the definition of true love, but then one day he goes to work at his car shop and doesn’t come back. He was found with his head bashed in in the back gate filled with used cars, there was no evidence of the murder object or any sight of the murderer, just nothing. That day the cops came to the house and told my mom the news and she instantly broke down crying. That day she was an attorney, the next she was nothing, she quit her dream and became this. A few days later after that John started coming over, John was one of my dads employees and since before Dad died he had a thing for mom. One day I come home from school and he’s there huggin mom and then soon he’s spending the night and then next thing you know, he’s moving in. I was angry at my mom.I still am, she moved on from dad instantly to another guy, a guy who controls her and made her into this drug addict and alcoholic, a guy that puts pain on me and her. I wished she understand that she doesn’t need him, I can get a job and I can take care of her but it seems like no matter what, I’m not enough for her.

I slip or my phone and call the only person I know that can help me. The phone finally picks up, a groggy voice comes on the line  
“Ya?”  
“Dean, thank god you answered, I need your help.”  
I head a bed squeal conforming my theory that Dean’s just now waking up for school, there’s a faint sound of footsteps and then the sound of the toilet bowl opening, splashing of a waterfalland finally a sign of relief.  
“God,I needed that..and that help is?”  
I sit back in the car seat, deciding I might as well get comfortable.  
“Well one is that my car isn’t starting and two maybe leave your phone where I can’t hear you relieving yourself of your urine.”  
“Okay, ill be over in a minute.. oh and almost forgot. Gotta get Savannah.”  
I release a deep breath. Ugh not Savannah

“Yes Cas, I know you hate Savannah’s, but hey, she’s hot.”  
I groan  
“Well I don’t necessarily hate her, nevermind change that, she’s a bitch Dean.”  
He laughs,”which makes it a whole lot better in bed actually.”  
I shake my head, it’s the same stuff over and over again, Dean hooks up with girl after girl and other than them being completely awful, I have to sit and watch the guy I secretly like with someone else all the time.

“Whatever, just tell me when your gonna get here, you know some of us do actually care about school.”  
The sound of jeans being slipped on and footsteps are heard  
“Okay okay. God you sound like Sam. I’ll be there, and try to get along with Savannah Kay?”  
I don’t answer  
“Casssss”  
I sign,” yeah whatever, but I’m not making any promises.”  
Keys jingle in the phone and I hear a door close  
“Okay, that’s the best I’m gonna get so I’ll take it.”  
The call ends and I relax into the seat  
_______________________________

The sounds of tapping on the window wakes me up. God I’ve must’ve been tired, I fell asleep right in the car, Dean opens the door.  
“Decided to take a lil nap I see.” He walks up to the front of the car and plays around for a minute in there, I rub the sleep from my eyes and look to his impala to see Savannah on he phone in the car, she doesn’t look to happy, not that I care. She sits with her big red lip stick colored lips perked out and makeup covered face with permed  
brown hair around her in the impala eyes on her phone.  
“Okay, well the problem is-“  
I raise my hand up,”Dean you know I’m not gonna understand any of this.just tell me if you can fix it or not?”  
He looks at me like I’ve just offended him  
“Ofcourse I can fix it! Don’t you know by now-“  
Savannah screams out the window  
“Dean!! I’m gonna be late!”  
“Okay baby, I’m coming.” He gets into his car and I open my back door to grab my backpack, walk to his car getting in the backseat, desperately not wanting to be here. Dean out the care in drive and heads to school. He plays his usual rock music from his tapes and I enjoy it until Savannah starts complaining about it and turns on her own music, yuck pop. We finally get to school.  
“You know Cas, Dean’s not gonna beable to just keep picking you up everytime you have an issue with your car or something, I couldn’t been late thanks to you.” She gets out the car and smooths down her too short of a skirt and fixes her tight breast hanging out shirt. I get out the bac  
“It’s nice to see you too Savannah.”  
She scowls and goes up to Dean wrapping her arms around his neck putting her lips on his, glancing my way like I was a predator. I decide toI can’t stand to watch this show much longer and pull my bag up more over my shoulder making my  
way to class.


	4. Chapter 4

I don’t even know why I took Spanish. I mean it ain’t like I really have to have it, when I think about it, it’s like when am I actually going to have a chance to go to Spain or something? Or even talk to Spanish people when I barely even talk to people that speak English. I sit in my desk leaning my head on my fist while doodling on my notes. I feel my phone vibrate and I know Mr. vines was strict about it when the semester first started but now the years about to be over so now we don’t have to stick them in his phone pockets in the back of the classroom, but I’m still self cautious with it. I sneak it out my back pocket and as a message from Dean

Dean: I’m bored tell me a joke

Cas: Okay but you know how bad my jokes are 

Dean: Ahh!! I don’t care I just need to think about something else besides Ms. Tutes a lot talking about sex

Cas: Wait isn’t Ms. Tutor an English teacher? 

Dean: yepp

Cas: then why is she talking about sex...?

Dean: you don’t wanna know..

Cas: your right I don’t, Okay so here’s the joke,a child approaches their mother and asks “where do babies come from?” And the mom fearing for her child’s innocence replies,”the stork brings them.” So the child asks “who has sexual intercourse with the stork?”

Dean:...

Cas: welllll you asked for a joke!

Dean: that’s an old one Cas

Dean: just told Sam, he says it’s so old that Jesus told it at the last supper lol.

Cas: pretty sure there no jokes told at the last supper bc Jesus probably didn’t have a sense of humor.

Dean: well how would you know?!

Cas: but how would you??

Dean: ...good point 

Cas: Exactly.

Dean: I’m gonna tell you some actual GOOD jokes later

I hear someone clearing their throat and look up, Mr. Hines is staring right at me with eyes that say,”do I really have to tell you?” He walks away

 

Cas: alert, gotta our phone away I’ll see you later, and oh yeah like your so much better.

I slip my phone back into my pocket and go back to drawing. I don’t know why, but drawing calms me, I know I’m not that good but still, It make me forget about my personal problems. The bell rings and I make my way down the hall, I know almost all of these people but at the same time I don’t know them. I get to my locker to put some stuff up and a little folded peice of paper falls out the door to the floor, I pick it up and unfold it

“You have the most beautiful blue eyes.”

I stare at it and turn around to find no one else in the hallway. great, I’m late for class. I look back at the note, this is the first time I’ve ever had something like this happen to me. Who wrote it though? Dean comes to mind. Was it him? The hand writing looks kind of similar to Dean’s, but he could’ve easily have just wrote differently so I wouldn’t know it was him or it could just not even be him, I mean Dean doesn’t even like me like that.. I’m afraid that’s only on my part. I stuff the note into my pocket and head to class, I make my way around the corner and run into someone 

“Sorry-“

It’s Chase, the kid who used to bully me all those years ago, he’s still the same mean guy he’s always been

“Watch where your goin’ dumbass.” He shoves past me, I sigh and make my way to class, what a way of ruining a good feeling.

Finally, this day is over. The last bell rings and I leave study hall, walk out the door and get my phone out to call Dean. I had my phone up to my ear and then I see him up front of me as he takes his phone out and puts it to his ear and turns to me 

“Hey” he says with a laugh 

I walk up to him and end the call,” god I’m hungry wanna get something to eat?”

“Yeah, where we going?”

We begin walking to his car until Savannah wraps her arms around him stopping him.

“Hey baby, so what we doing this afternoon?”  
Dean glances to me andI pretend to look at my phone 

“Well actually me and Cas are going to eat.”  
She pouts   
“Aww, well can I join?”

Dean tries to catch my eye again but nope I’m not going to make Dean do anything, this is his choice. 

“Actually I gotta take Cas to a doctor after and I’m his ride so I’ll have to stay with him there and you know how long waiting for a doctor can be..”   
that quickly did the trick because she lets go   
“Okay, well I’ll see you later my little Deanie Wienie-“ I mimic  
“Shut-up.” He says immediately and gets in the impala.  
“Ah, I missed you baby.” He rubs the car steering wheel and puts it into drive as I buckle up.

“So I have a doctors appointment today?” I say with a smirk

“Yeah, I just needed to get her off my ass, I just wanted it to be me and you.” I blush and look out the window

 

We get to a diner and slide into our seats, soon a waitress with a slim figure and hair up into a high ponytail comes to us with her notepad. She gets to the table and her eyes focus on me, it’s like I’m a caribou in the wilderness and she’s the tiger.

“So what can I get you boys this evening?”  
Dean speaks up,”sweety can you give me y’alls homestyle Texas burger with extra onions and a plain black coffee.” 

I can see Dean trying to put on his charm for the waitress, but then his eyebrows raise when she puts a hand on my shoulder 

“And what can I do for you cutie?”  
I give her fake smile and look at the menu  
“Uhm I’ll just get what he got but no extra onions   
,And coffee but with cream and sugar.”  
She grips my shoulder, her nails going deep into it, I flinch

“Okay cutie I’ll be right back.” And flaunts away  
Dean looks at me and raises him eyebrows up and down with a smirk

I sigh,”shutup.”

“So looks like that waitress wants to have you for dinner.”

I shake my head 

“Ah come on Cas, I mean maybe this is what you need, a hookup.”

 

I stare at him, he has no clue how I really feel. The waitress comes back with two plates of burgers and two coffees, sets them down for us,

“Thank you-“ I say 

She drifts her hand over mine   
“Anything for you baby..” and makes her way, Dean immediately gets into his burger and drinks his coffee

“So anything interesting happen to you today?” He asks between bites and drinking his coffee

I consider talking about the note but decide I probably shouldn’t, what if it isn’t even him and I would just embarrass myself.

“No..you?”  
He already finished his burger and is wiping his hands with a napkin 

“Nope, just classes, hooked up with Savannah’s in the janitors closet and that’s about it.”

I drop my burger on my plate  
“That’s just a normal day for you isn’t it?”  
He shrugs, “pretty much.”

I finish my burger and the waitress comes back and takes the money, leaves a receipt with change upfront of me, walking Away once again touching me, Dean grabs it and chuckles 

“What’s so funny?” I ask stacking up our plates, he turns it towards me, written on it is 

“Call me ***-***-*** XOXO”

 

I just shake my head and start walking to the door

“Hey-Wait for me, I’m your ride remember?” He gets up and follows me, we pass by his house and he asks if I wanna stay the night, I think about it but decide that I should probably go home and clean up, maybe catch up on some work. He takes me home and says he’ll text me and makes his way in his black impala.


	5. Chapter 5

I open the front door and everything's silent, the lights are all off. I see the bottles still surrounding the couch and go into the kitchen to see pieces of glass from plates everywhere on the floor, walk down the hallway with just the sound of the creaking floorboards under my feet.  
"Mom..?"  
I go to her room and find her passed out on the bed and see needles on the table, oh no. I run over to her  
"Mom! Mom! Come on..."  
I start prying her eyes open and her pupils are dilated,hair is sticking to her face from the sweat covering her body. My hands grab her shoulders and I shake her over and over again but her body just slumps back down on the bed. I grab my phone out ready to call an ambulance, but an arm wraps around my neck and I'm shoved against the wall. The smell of booze and sweat fill my nose as he whispers into my ear  
"What the fuck do you think your doing?"  
He pulls my arms back behind my back and throws my phone on the ground, I gasp as his nails dig deep into my arms.  
"Think your gonna just call the cops and get me into deep shit huh?"

"No john..I ah- was just gonna call the ambulance and-"  
I stop when I feel a cord wrap around my wrist,  
"I don't care what you was gonna do-"  
I swing my head backwards and head butt him as he's tying my wrists together and break lose from him, run down the hall with my wrists still tied together. I get to The door and he knocks me off the porch and gets on top of me and hits me over and over again in the face  
"Ha your just like your weak ol' dad. Weak son of a' bitch." He punches and punches me, I struggle trying to get my hands free but it's not working, My body's weak and the taste of blood fills my mouth, I open my eyes after The pounding stops and he grabs me by my shirt collar  
"If you do anything, and I mean ANYTHING that could take your mom away from me, I WILL KILL YOU." The smell of alcohol fills my nostrils as he breaths out into my face, He gets up and walks back into the house. I lie there on the ground for what seems to be hours, my face is bruised up and all I can taste is my own blood. I look up at the stars in the night sky wishing I was one of them. 

I walk down the street slowly, with my hood over my head trying to cover my face each time I see headlights coming in the distance, I don't want anyone Driving to see me like this. It starts raining, great, I think to myself, just what I needed. I finally make it to Dean's house and see the lights still on, I grab the key under the mat and enter the house, no ones in the living room, their probably in bed already, I hear a faint sound of a guitar being played. I pass by his dads room ofcourse, it's empty, I've only met his dad once years ago, his name's Joe, and that's all I know about him. I open his bedroom door to find him playing his guitar, I stand at the entrance for a minute and wait till he noticed me.  
"Hey-"  
He stops and stares at my bruised face,jumps up and quickly walks over to me  
"Holy crap.." he yanks me to the bathroom and sits me on the toilet seat and starts wetting a washcloth.  
"Hold on, let me get some bandages and medicine for you." He leaves out the bathroom Fast and I sit there and wait. Why did I come here, I didn't want him to see me like this.. and now he has, I'd feel more regretful about coming here if my body didn't hurt so much.  
He comes back in with bandages and cream, he grabs a washcloth and soaks it in hot water from the sink and put it to a red,purple colored bruise on my head, I flinch as it touches me.  
He gently traces the warm cloth on my bruised eye and then down to the cut on my lip, his gaze leaves my lips and go up to meet my eyes. We lock eyes, his green eyes shine bright in the light, the color of a pretty green apple. I wonder what he sees right now, other than this poor example of a human being.  
"Why are you looking at me like that?" I ask tilting my head  
He keeps his eyes on me and finally stops  
"Oh just making sure your not gonna pass out on me or anything." He says and pulls me eyes more open to scan them.  
"Where's Sam?" I ask  
"He's with his study group."

He pats a bandage on my face  
"Cas.. I thought you told me this was over."  
I don't say anything 

"You told me that asshole wasn't doing this anymore.. this has to stop Cas."

He starts unbuttoning my shirt which catches me by suprise and I catch his hands  
"It's okay.. I gotta patch up the rest of your body. I can tell your hurting everywhere."  
I slowly let go. He unbuttons my shirt and I turn my head as he sees the scars on my body that stayed from years ago, he puts his attention on the fresh scars from tonight and puts antibiotics on it, starts patching them up  
"Dean-"  
"Hm?" He tapes the bandage on  
"Where's your mom and dad?"  
He doesn't reply  
"Dean-"  
He leaves my shirt off and goes to his room and comes back with a Led Zeppelin shirt and grey sweatpants and put them in my hands  
"Put this on."  
He walks out the bathroom to his room and  
I look into the mirror, blue eyes stare back, but other than that It's like a whole different person looking back. I take off my wet jeans and slip on The shirt and sweatpants, feeling the soft warm material sliding onto my body, it's a little big so The shirt goes farther than my waist some and the sweatpants are a little lose. I breath out a breathe that feels as though Its been held in, its not like this is the first time I'm spending the night with him anyway and I mean what's the best nervous about, he's my best friend,Maybe it's the adrenaline from earlier. I shove my hands in my hair and ruffle it up out of stress, I'm thinking too much. That's it, I grab my wet clothes and go to Dean's room.


	6. Chapter 6

I open the door to find him Laying on his bed with headphones on, he takes them off when he notices me. I drop my wet clothes into his dirty basket and sit on the side of the bed, he doesn't say a word and turns on the tv.   
I lie back next to him  
"I feel like I'm getting the silent treatment."  
He puts the remote down and faces me  
"How could you not tell me. Do you know how pissed off i am right now."  
I chuckle as I focus on the screen  
"Ha it's not your face looking like a punching bag."  
"I'm serious Cas.  
I nod,"I know Dean, I know."  
"No you don't know! I'm your best friend and I don't know that this shit is happening to you?!" He screams   
"I just didn't wanna throw my problems at you." I bow my head down  
"Your problems are my problems Cas, I have to protect you-"  
I get furious and purse my lips together   
"I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself!"  
Dean scoffs   
"Yeah I can see that."   
I cross my arms and chew on my lip, trying to hold my temper   
"Look, Id just wish you could just come stay here Cas, you can stay however long you want, until you go to college or whatever or-  
I stop him right there  
"Dean I can't leave my mom."  
He looks at me in the eyes  
"Okay Cas, but you have to promise me that if this happens again, you stay here."  
I knew that he wasn't going to let this go unless I agreed so I said okay, but I know this will happen again, it's been like this for years but not usually this far, that's why for so long I've been able to hide it from the world. We agree to watch the proposal, well actually I agreed,Dean didn't exactly want to, he doesn't like romance movies or what he calls,"chick flicks." So he told me since I'm hurt that well watch it. He went and popped some popcorn and grabbed some sodas. I love doing these things with him, it makes me forget about my problems like having a mom that shoots up and other stuff to escape from the world and guy living in my home who supports her into doing that, while hitting me and her, or the fact that I don't know if I'm going to college or what I'm doing with my life.. but this makes me forget about all of those. I turn to see Dean smiling at the tv,ha, "no chick flicks", yeah right. I love his smile, it just brightens up a whole room, it stops the dark empty feeling that's trying to consume my mind and body. 

"Hey, remember how ticklish you were when we were kids?" I ask him

"Uhm, no. I don't know what your talking about." He says looking at the tv  
I laugh,"oh you don't,really?"  
I tickle him under the ear and he quickly moves away  
"Oh no your not getting away." I move to him and get on top of him and try to force my hands under his arms to tickle him but he's holding them down  
"Cas seriously stop-" he tries to say with a serious face but it breaks once i finally get under his arms, he squirms around as I tickle him behind the neck,grabbing my wrist and rolls over to where now I'm on bottom. He holds my arms down by my sides and lowers his head, I feel his warm breath on my neck as he stays straddling me. I try to lift my arms but they don't budge, as he whispers into my ear  
,"that the best you got?" I whisper back,"no" and lick the side of his face, that made him lift away his hands and I rolled back on top.

He wiped his face and we both start laughing, our laughs dial down and I straddle him with my hands on his chest,we lock eyes. I think about getting off of him, but somethings holding me back, I think about turning away but somethings making me stay. 

"What are you guys doing?"  
We both turn around and see Sam in doorway  
I get off of him and sit next to him  
Neither of us say anything   
"Holy crap Cas,what happened to you.."  
He walked closer and analyzed the bruise on my cheek  
"Oh I just.. "  
"Got into a fight." Dean finishes  
"Oh wow, don't see you as the fighting type."  
"Well I'm not, obviously."I say pointing to my bruised up face  
"Well I'm going to sleep, AP Chemistry really wiped me out, night guys." He walks out and closes the door.  
I lie down next to Dean   
"I'm pretty tired too, how bout you?" He asks   
I nodded for him to turn out the light.  
"Night Cas." He turns his back to me and puts his arm under his pillow, while I look up at the ceiling, "Goodnight Dean."


	7. Chapter 7

My alarm clock wakes us both up, I slug out the bed while Dean groans and complains about. I go to the bathroom and look in the mirror, really wishing I had something to cover these bruises up with, I guess I could sneak into in the house real quick and grab some of mom's makeup, oh how fun will it be putting makeup on in-front of Dean. Note the sarcasm. I go back into his room and he's still sleeping, I call his name, nothing, I shake him and yell his name, god he sleeps like a bear.So I went to the kitchen, got a cup of ice cold water and poured the whole thing on, he woke up screaming and shivering,"should've got up then." I say and throw some of his clothes at him, "come on, I gotta stop by my place real quick."  
   I get into the car and park outside my house. I really don't want to come back.. but I know I'm always going to come back because of my mom. Dean tells me if theirs a problem to scream for him and of-course I tell him I can take care of myself, but it was sweet, god I'm crazy for this guy. I walk into the house to find my mom drinking coffee at the kitchen table, she sees me and looks down in her cup, I start walking away  
"Cas.." she calls out  
I stop and slowly make my way to the table and she nods to the chair.  She puts her hand on my face gently tracing over the bruises until tears start coming down, I grab her hand  
"Mom, it's okay...I'm okay..I promise.."  
She keeps crying, just as hard as she did when she found out about dad being dead  
"I just..I just don't know what to do anymore...I know I have a problem. If I wasn't messed up this wouldn't have happened.."  
I shake my head,"Mom no this has been happening, can't you see how bad John is.."  
She looks out the window, dried tears on her face  
"He just gets like that when he's drunk.. he's really not like that.."  
"Which is all the time mom, and that's no excuse.." I look at her arm and see bruises on her wrist and I grab her arm  
"Mom..look at this.. did dad ever do that to you? Did he ever do this to me?" I point towards my face. She doesn't say anything as she looks in her cook, I knew this wasn't going to do anything, it never does. I get up from the table and go to the bathroom and grab out her makeup bag, realizing I don't know how to use makeup. I look at the colors of foundation and think to myself which one to do before I look up and see my mom in the mirror. She nods to the toilet and I sit as she dabs and brushes the foundation on me, I look into the mirror when she's done and now you can't see huge purple bruises on my face. I grab my backpack and make my way out the door after she hugs me and get into the car, we start leaving and He turns down the radio for a second,  
"Everything okay?"  
I nod looking forward but really it's not. I'm struggling, it's hard to see my mom the way she is, hard to be the way I am, it's hard to see Dean never telling how he truly feels and knowing that I love my best friend and I can never tell him, everything is just so hard.


	8. Chapter 8

We drive down the highway as Lynyrd Skynyrd Simple Man plays on the radio. Every second I could feel Dean's eyes burning into the side of my head, I was about to turn down the radio and ask if I really looked that bad that even the thing that's supposed to solve all problems with someone's facial appearance couldn't even fix it, before he turns down the radio himself

"Wanna do something?" He glances at me before looking back at the road   
I look at him, seeing his eyes flickering green from the sunlight  
"Yeah sure, what do you wanna do later?"   
He waves it off  
"Pssh, not later, now."  
"But what about school?" I ask

I actually never skipped school, I am always there, Dean on the other hand is always about skipping. He scans me over for a quick second   
"What about it?"  
I open my mouth, ready to object and tell Him exactly why I need to be at school before he stops me  
"Cas..look at yourself, I think you deserve a day off, don't you?"  
I glare at him  
"Wow thanks Dean."  
"I'm serious Cas, c'mon, it's our senior year. Let's make a day we'll remember."

I think about it for a minute, it would be nice to just hang out today and do something fun away from this town. I can take off a day from school, right? Right.  He waits for my answer, ready to turn around if it's a no, I nod and let out a breathe   
"Okay,Let's do this." I say   
"Yes!" He shouts as he hits the steering wheel,accidentally taking both hands off it and the car starts steering to the outside of the road. I quickly grab the wheel and pull the car back inside the road and he takes it  
"Just don't kill us." I say   
He now looks concerned and rubs the steering wheel  
"Aww, I'm Sorry baby.."  
I shake my head   
He sees me and smiles, turns up the radio as he steps on the gas, we drive off with the lyrics of Highway to Hell playing,  
"no stop signs, speed limit   
Nobody's gonna slow me down  
Like a wheel, gonna spin it.."  
______________________

We rode like there was no worries,Dean sings loudly to all of his rock tapes while I sung with him on ones I knew but mainly I just listened to him, Dean can sing like it's nothing. When he sings it's like you see his true self, everyday I would see him and it always seems like he's not telling you something, but when he's doing things he loves, that's when the true Dean comes out. He shouts as he sings to the upbeat songs and when a softer serious one comes on he sings with a low beautiful voice with an expression that says I'm at peace. I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I hear Dean murmur a "hell Yeah."  
We pull into a pie diner and he quickly parks, practically runs inside. After we get to the booth our waitress comes over, Dean gets a cherry pie of-course and I said I didn't want anything but a milkshake but Dean told the waitress to bring another plate so he could split his anyway. We ate the pie and I sipped on my milkshake while we talked and laughed at the silly things that we did together and our childhood memories. Dean talked about the time he and Sam were on the shed pretending to be superhero's, Dean was superman while Sam was Batman. Sam ended up getting hurt and Dean took him all the way to to the hospital on his handlebars and he always explains to Sam that it was a foolish thing for him to do because Batman can't even fly, I snorted and milkshake spews out my mouth. Dean smiles as I quickly grab a napkin and wipe around my mouth. 

We left the diner and went to the beach, it was mostly empty since it was a week day. The seagulls fly above the blue water moving in the wind, the smell of salt water and clean air fills my nose as we walk through the soft sand towards to water. Dean drags his shirt over his head and starts taking off his pants revealing tiger covered boxer briefs

"Nice underwear." I say shaking my head with a smile  
He grins and winks before turning around, walking into the water, My cheeks fill with color  
"Ya coming or what?" He calls at me  
I look down at my shirt, knowing years of pain are underneath. Okay, it's okay, Dean's seen them already, I can do this. I slip my shirt off revealing some bruises and scars covering half of my torso, and began moving to my pants, slowly unbuckling them,pulling them down, showing my white boxers. The wind instantly blows towards me making me shiver, look up to find Dean's eyes on me. I start walking through the water feeling my cold shiver slip away being under the ray of sunshine hitting the glistening water. 

"What? Wait let me guess- wow Cas, why such dull underwear?" I poorly imitate his voice and Chuckle, combing water through my hair 

Dean glares at me 

"First of all, I do not sound like that, second- actually yeah those are pretty dull, you should spice it up a bit, like me."

I splash water at him and he splashes back, hitting waves of water at each-other. I jump on him trying to push him down in the water and fail miserably because Dean picks me up, tossing me out in the deeper part of water. I swim my way up to find him nowhere is sight, before I'm tugged by my legs into the water again. My body plunders into the water and Dean looks at me with his mouth closed for air, His eyes gaze at me and I look back as we stay there for a second, my breath is going away and I swim up to the surface. I breathe out an enveloped breath and he comes soon after. 

"Ha, I win." He says Like that was no struggle for him at all

"Oh shut-up" I smile, lie on my back letting the water sail me underneath the sky. We lie back together for hours floating along the water, not saying anything, just enjoying the comforting silence and peace. 

The sun goes away behind clouds and soon darkness Fills the world, we grab our shirts and pants and make our way to the car. I offer to drive but of course  Dean wouldn't let me or  anyone else drive the impala. Stars fills the sky and the faint sound of humming fills the car as we drive away from the beach.

We pull into his driveway and silently open the front door, the faint creaking ringing from the hinges. I look into the living room as we pass it and see a man, Dean's dad with his head tilted back in the chair covered in fuzz, bottle of whiskey in his hand and more settle on the table. Dean shuts his bedroom door, closing it silently behind me, I always knew something was up with Dean's dad but I didn't know he was like that. He puts on a shirt and pajama pants and plops on the bed, I sit on the edge twirling my fingers between the sheets 

"I know what your gonna say and it's not a problem."He says  
I let go of my fidgeting   
"Dean, your dads a drunk too, why didn't you tell me this?"  
He looks at me dumbfounded   
"Cas, I'm not gonna just tell you,"hey I have a dad that used to be great but now things are screwed up and he drinks himself to death. Plus you have your own problems.."   
I rub my head in frustration   
"Dean, you can tell me anything. You know that, I wanna help. I can't see you living like this."  
"Well what about you Cas?! I have to see you like this okay? Every-time I see those scars it makes me so angry and I just want to kill that guy and knowing that there's nothing that I can really do!"  
I see his fist clench   
I lick my lip  
"Okay, from now on I'm gonna tell you everything and your going to tell me everything."  
He looks at me for a minute and finally makes a sharp nod  
"Dean, what happened to your mom?"  
He looks at me again and then turns away  
"She..cancer."  
I desperately want to turn his face and look him into the eyes and tell him I'm here and explain how much I love him, but I just can't.   
"I'm so sorry Dean."  
"Im okay." He says sternly, looking the other way  
I grab ahold of his arm, surprising him, making him look down at his arm and back at me   
"No..your not."


	9. Chapter 9

This morning, Dean woke up by himself. we got ready and he stopped by Sam's room to see if he was home. Dean was getting worried before he got a text from Sam, explaining that he came home last night to find dad on the couch wasted and how he was worried about him waking up so he went to a friends house. Last night Dean talked about how Ever since their mom died his dad is always gone, all he does is leave Him some money for him and Sam to live on and then makes his way to whatever he does, no calls, no texts, nothing. But when he does come back for a night or two he hits Sam out of his drunk ness before Dean stops it because His brother  isn't a fighter, he would never hit his dad no matter if he's hitting him, but Dean's a different story, he fights back if he even sees his dad touch Sam.  
_____________________

The bell rung for school to be let out. I grabbed my backpack over one should and made my way out of study hall, making my way to my locker. The sound of chatter and shoes thrive in the building as Shoulders slide last each-other, making their way outside and soon the halls are quiet; I sigh as I meet my locker, putting in my combination digit by digit. I get it open, a folded note sits in front of my books by itself, my hand slowly grabs it, wondering what it's going to say this time. The crinkle of the paper fills my ears as I open it

"Meet me at the pond during senior bash. 7:00."

I swallow a lump in my throat as I close the letter. Guess I'm going to the senior bash.

I lean against the fence of the school football field, watching the players drenched in sweat as they practice while getting told orders from the coach

"Winchester! Get out there and show these juniors how to do it." The coach screams out, spitting out bits of dip from his mouth, leaking down his chin. Ew, i scrunch my face up in disgust.

Dean comes running from the bench with his jersey hanging over his shoulders and tight pants around his legs. Unlike the other players, his Face has no signs of sweat and exhausting. He puts on his helmet, shoulder muscles flexing as he grabs the ball with a face of seriousness, I bite down on the edge of my lip as my heart races at the sight of Dean. He bends down as the rest of the team goes to their positions

"Set! Green 80! Green 80! Hut-Hut!" 

The other team mate snags the ball and Then throws it to Dean across the field. His leg muscles flex against his pants as he runs along with his arms holding onto the football. Another player jumps in front of him and he rams his side into him, knocking the guy onto the ground. I wince and purse my mouth, feeling kinda bad for the guy because that looked like it hurt. Dean runs, sliding under other players and hopping over fallen ones until he meets the end zone and he drops the ball on the ground, scoring. I start clapping my hands and scream   
"Go Dean Winchester!" 

He looks my way and catches me, he smiles and I grin back. On the side of my eyes I catch the guy that Dean rammed into growing close to Dean and open my mouth to tell him before The guy punches Dean in the face. All the players go pull the player back by the arms and rip off his helmet, Chase is shown with his face covered in sweat and red hair tied up in a shirt ponytail, all the compassion for the guy being rammed into the ground instantly evaporated from me.I'm about to run out there before I hear the coach screaming as he marches to Chase, Dean gets up from the ground looking furious but then smirks and shrugs at me as the coach yanks Chase by the back of the neck 

"We don't do that shit on this team Richards! Just for that give me 20 Laps!"

Chase groans, glaring at Dean as he begins to run  
___________  
I lean on the wall outside the door as the sound of chatter and a smell of manly musk comes from the locker rooms. Dean walks out, duffel bag over shoulder, in a red flannel and jeans with a faint smell of apple pie and leather, laughing at a something someone said. He sees me and Nods me over, I pull myself off the wall and begin walking beside him

"Enjoy the show?"

I chuckle and nod, not knowing what to say, should I say the truth, yes I really enjoyed it because you looked hot as hell out there..and you still do.No of-course not.

"It was definitely interesting"

He laughs and shoves his hands in his pocket  
"So senior bash huh?"  
I nod looking at my shoes   
"Yeah, Are you going?" I ask  
He nods  
"Yeah I was gonna ask you something.."

Maybe Dean is the one who left me those notes, and he just wants to surprise me at the pond to reveal himself, I think with excitement

"Well Savannah has this friend that doesn't wanna go without a date so she told me to find someone to go as a date for her friend-

I erase everything I just thought of before, I need to stop getting my hopes up. "Of course it wasn't going to be like that Cas! He's your friend."I think to myself 

"And so I thought hey, who's the best guy I know?"

You know that point where you literally feel your heart getting crunched to pieces, that's how I feel

"So you just want me to go on a blind date so you can get something from Savannah tonight, right?"

He scoffs,"oh I know I'd get something either way, I was just mentioning it because I kinda want you to be there too.ya know?"

Dean throws his bag into the back of the impala And we got in closing our doors.  I waited for us to start moving but we sat still, I looked at him 

"Cas, C'mon. Come with us, please?"  
I knew I was going to have to go because of the mystery guy I'm meeting, but just thinking of going with Savannah dreads me. 

"pwetty  pweaseeee,  with cherries ontop, and by ontop I mean on top of pie?"

I sigh and look at him with frustration, why does he have to be with her, why do I have to like someone that I don't have a chance with. And why does he have to look so good?! finally give in and he says he'll make it up to me, but how can you make it up to my crumbling heart.

______________________________

 

Dean dropped me off at my house and was going to pick me back up After he changes clothes too. I tried calling Mom earlier to see if she was there but she didn't answer, so I walked inside planning on getting my clothes before John walked down the hall, the smell of beer filling the air

"Where's your mom?"  
He slurs out to me  
"I don't know."  
I try sliding away to my room but he blocks me   
I can't do this now, I think to myself and turn around walking out the door before he can stop me, shutting the door behind me. I take out my phone and call Dean to come get me, soon his car pulls up and he looks out the window

"You didn't change?" He asks  
I shrug, nodding to the house   
"I kinda can't."  
He opens his mouth, closes then opens again   
"What is it, John? He giving you problems again?"  
He yanks open the door, stepping out, now wearing a grey flannel folded at the elbows with a white t-shirt under it and jeans tucked in boots  
"Ya know what, lemme talk to this guy."  
I get in his way   
"Dean, it's fine. Really, it is."

I know Dean could probably easily beat Johns ass, but I cannot risk him getting into trouble for doing something. He looks at me for a moment before getting back in the car. We get to his house and pass Sam doing some homework in the living room, then make our way to his room. Dean digs in his closet, looking for something for me to wear. I sit on the bed as things get tossed down next to me, blue jeans and flannels and band shirts get tossed down next to me. He turns around and has some folded clothes in his hands, 

"Put these on."

I unfold the clothes revealing ripped black skinny jeans with a grey T-shirt and a blue-jean jacket

"I've never worn those before. After my dad started leaving my uncle started coming over and just looking out for us whenever he can, one day he showed up with some clothes."

He turns back around to the closet and scrounges more around in there, I slip off my shirt and pants, pulling on the skinny jeans and T-shirt with blue-jean jacket. 

"Hey Cas, what about th-"

He goes silent as he scans me from the ground up, stopping at my face. The light green eyes, turn darker green, his pupils dilate with his mouth slightly open

"Is..is there something wrong?" I go to the mirror hanging on the wall

He smiles as he grabs his keys  
"No nothings wrong."  
He walks out the room and I look back in the mirror, Dean pops his head back around the corner

"You should keep that outfit by the way, I mean..if you want to or whatever." 

He disappears back around the corner


	10. Chapter 10

Dean's POV  
I pull out another outfit, thinking maybe Cas would like this instead. He seemed like he didn't like the ones I tossed at him

"Hey Cas, what about th-"

I turn to find Cas standing there with the clothes I never worn before that Bobby gave me, the black ripped skinny jeans and the shirt with a blue-jean jacket on, and damn he looks so HOT. I bite my tongue a little making sure I don't say the things that are going through my mind. That smooth messy head of black hair And those eyes, they are just popping out with beautiful ocean blue, I always think he’s beautiful but I mean this, this made me want to just push him against that wall and- Okay Dean, this is your best friend your talking about. Don't make it awkward, just be your usual Dean self, ugh just so much stuff I want to do to him right now though, it's crazy.. but Cas deserves better than me. He deserves more than someone like me. So I stay silent. Ever since I met this little blue eyed dark hair kid years ago I've just felt this connection with him, like he's different from everyone else and I was right. Cas, you are perfect. I wish I could take you away from here, from pain, but just like you not being able to leave your mom, I can’t leave Sammy. But soon when I save enough money I’m gonna take you and Sam away from here. I don’t care if you don’t like me the way I like you, I just want you for you. Not want but need, We need you, I need you. 

We pick up Savannah and her annoying friend, I don't know why I bother with Savannah. It's just Cas doesn't like me back like that of course because I'm pretty sure he's full on straight, even though it is kinda odd that all these years I haven't seen him with any girl, or guy in that matter. The whole reason I mess with Savannah is because I need something to get my mind off the person I really like. I look in the rear view mirror to see that girl what's her name, Jessica? Yeah, Jessica all over him back there and he's looking really uncomfortable. Jessica twirls her hair with her finger as she talks about how this girls outfit was today, having her other hand on His thigh, ugh this was a bad idea. She goes to his ear and whispers something I can't hear but What else would it be. I see she doesn't have her seatbelt on and my foot slams on the brakes at the stop sign making her fall off the seat, Cas holds back a laugh as he purse's his lips pulling her back up. Her long black hairs on her face as she growls at me to learn how to drive, Savannah scowls and I try to keep a straight face when she looks at me with a face of disapproval, lipstick in hand and some drawn on her face.  
"Not bad." I say meeting eye contact with my friend in the back seat, his lips spread into a sly smile.  
_____________________________  
Unknown's POV  
I finally pushed myself to leave A note in Cas' locker, telling him how beautiful his eyes are. I just lose myself in them, I can't wait to finally start being a thing with him, I mean I'm sure he wouldn't reject me. Right?? Whatever,that's crazy talk.Once he sees me and understands how much I secretly love him he'll be with me. I just hate seeing him with Dean ALL the time, I just HATE Dean. Like how is he any better than me huh?! I take out my phone and go through my pictures of the beautiful blue eyed guy that I've secretly taken while he was alone. I got one when he was sitting outside on his porch, I slide my finger to another one, when we were at PE while everyone else is on their phones or playing basketball, he just sits there with his cute self on the bleachers reading a book. Tons of them. Just for me to look at when I'm angry, it gives me peace. He probably thinks of me as some horrible person, but really it's the opposite, I don't hate him. I LOVE Cas so much it drives me insane, I just feel like I have to do something now, I have to tell him how I feel because I'm going insane from not touching him, from not being able to kiss him. I just wanna kiss those pink full lips and never let go. I will never let you go Castiel. Never. Ha look at me smiling like an idiot now, just from thinking of you. I wish you hung out with me than with Dean. After I confess my love to you, I'm sure it'll change. I remember your face after you read my note to you, how pink your cheeks got and how your eyes lit up. When I meet you I'm gonna show you what you mean to me, I'm going to make you fall in love with me too and then we'll be together, just you and me.


	11. Chapter 11

The whole place is crowded, some people sit around a campfire playing music from speakers, the smell of marijuana and alcohol surrounds the crowds of seniors. When I turn to Dean he's already getting dragged off by Savannah to a group of people, probably to smoke, her friend Jessica pulls me with her to a chair around the campfire, plopping down on my lap. I shift uncomfortably at the transition as she leans back on my shoulder, crossing her legs.  More kids are surrounding the fire on their own chairs passing around a pipe, one girl looks at me, well I think she's looking at me, her eyes are red and kind of crossed together, she looks like she doesn't even know where she's at. Jessica is next for the pipe and puts it to her mouth and breathes in as she light the top, inhaling more than I've ever seen a human inhale something, she lets out a big puff of smoke in my face, I cough. She brings it upfront of my me

"Wanna hit it?"  
I shake my head  
"No thanks."

I look at my phone   
6:30  
need to go to the pond soon to meet whoever's been leaving me notes. I think about why I'm even doing this, isn't it dangerous? I mean what if they turn out to be some kind of crazy person, no I'm sure it'll be fine. I always hoped it was Dean though, I really did, I do. Him telling me how he likes me more than just a friend and I'll tell him that I've felt the same way for so long. I get lost in my thoughts when the pipes shoved to my mouth

"C'mon don't be a pussy." She laughs looking high as a kite. I push her hand with the pipe away and cough my lungs out. Her hand lands on my leg and she turns around now straddling me on the chair, wrapping her arms around my neck

She whispers seductively into my ear,

"we'll if you don't wanna do that, I got something else that your mouth could do.”

She bites my ear-lobe.   
"Umm, I gotta go to the bathroom."

I quickly slide out the chair, leaving her there, making my way into the woods. Theres no sign of Dean anywhere, I make my way to the pond down the hill passing people making out and groping each-other against trees. Poor trees. Farther and farther Through the woods, the less people are and I finally get to the pond. Lily pads drift across the water as the sound of crickets buzz through the night, the silence and being alone now makes me feel as though I can finally breath. I let out a deep breath and pull out my phone  
7:31  
The sound of leaves crunching on the ground makes me quickly look up. A shadow of a person stands a few feet up front of me next to a bush, their whole body is covered in darkness, it's a guy, his upper body looks faintly like Dean's

"Dean?"   
I manage to croak out   
The anonymous figure starts walking out the shadows, their appearance coming more and more into view

"Hey Castiel."

their voice sounds nothing like Dean's, Dean's is a lot deeper than that, but it sounds familiar, Just can't put a face to it.  They finally come out the shadows of the trees into the light, leaves crunch at their every step.red hair hangs on the side of his face as his eyes gleam at me in the dark

"I didn't think you would show up"

He stops close in-front of me   
My shoulders tense up and I back up a little

"Uh..hey Chase.."I manage to croak out  
He closes the gap between us again looking at me in the eyes 

"So.. your the one that's been leaving me notes?"   
He chuckles   
"Ha, Yeah, well It was about time I told you how I feel about you.”

He grabs my hand and puts it to his mouth tracing his lips over it, I pull my hand back from him and shove them in my pockets 

"What are you talking about? You hate me. You've always bullied me."

He walks towards me making me back up until I'm against a tree 

"That just because I didn't know how to tell you. But now you know.”

His mouth forms into a creepy grin, my eyes grow wide as he traces his finger on my cheek

"Cas,I've always loved you. And now since I told you how I always felt for you, I was hoping you would want to be with me?"

I slide around him off the tree and he turns around to me

"Chase.. I'm sorry, but I don't feel the same way."

He moves me quickly against another tree and leans both hands on the sides of me on the tree

"Well not now, but I promise you will soon..I'll take care of you Cas, I'm sorry for treating you like that all these years I was just scared, but please give me a chance?" He whispers 

My feet are on the overgrown roots as my back is pressed tightly against the bark

"I'm sorry, I really am.." I quietly say

His expression turns gruesome as his voice gets loud

"What do you mean your sorry?! Are you-are you rejecting me?"

I jump a little at his voice, Chase looks as me with a crazy expression, teeth gritting together

I push my hands against his chest trying to shove him off me, but it's not working, he's stronger than me. He grabs my wrists and tosses me on the ground, on top of me holding me down with his weight. 

"I just really like you Cas, why don't you like me back? I just want you to like me."

He lets go of my arms and slides his hands up my shirt some and I scramble my arms across the ground looking for a rock, something to get him off of me

"Get off me- agh-HEL-"  
His covers a hand over my mouth and I pull on it trying to remove it

"Just give me a chance Castiel."

I manage to bite his finger, he screams in pain 

"Your crazy!" I scream out 

His hand plops back in my mouth, tightly shutting my mouth so I can't bite 

"Now aren't you being feisty.. I like feisty.”

He kisses the side of my neck as my arms are held up now leaving me to feel his hot breath on my skin after every rough kiss. I mumble against his hand loudly to try to get someone to help, but the musics so loud up there, no ones coming. My hearts beating so fast against my chest as he moves his hand from trapping my arms up and I hear my belt buckle clank. I push his arms away from my pants and kick him in the stomach making him get off me and try to get up before he shoves me down again flipping out a pocket knife to my throat making me freeze.

"I didn't think I would've had to bring this out,but I guess I was wrong."

I lie still and gulp as I feel his hand sliding in my pants, turning my head away, I feel ridiculous, it makes me sick

"What the fuck?! Get off him!"

Dean comes into focus and punches Chase off me

"Ya know what? I should've done this a long time ago."

He gets on Chase knocking the pocket knife out his hand and punches his face over and over and over again while Chase doesn't even have the chance to fight back and lies still, barely conscious. I hear music going quiet, People start coming down the hill pulling out their phones recording Dean beating Chase.   
"Dean..Dean!" I call to him to get him to stop because besides him making Chase’s face look like a train wreck he was getting recorded by every phone at that party. He stops with Chase's head limped backwards as he's gripping his shirt, looking around at all the bright phone lights staring back at him. Dean gets up, grabbing my hand pulling me up with him as he shoves through everyone with their phones recording and gossiping to each-other, seeing Savannah and her friend along with them. We get to the car and I yank out of his grip

"Let go of me."  
He stops and looks at me squinting his eyes  
"Why are you mad at me? I just saved your ass back there."

"I could've handled it.." I mumble to myself getting into the car and slamming the door. But In honesty, I knew that I wouldn't have been able to handle it, if Dean didn't come there, If no one came, I don't even want to say what I think would’ve happened. I just know that now Because of me being weak and having to have Dean help me , now he's going to probably be everywhere on the internet, everyone seeing him beat the crap out of someone. He gets in after and we drive off leaving dust to fly from the wheels behind us. The sky is filled with darkness with all the stars covered up, we pass by tree after tree growing over us on the backroad we were on as the moon illuminates over them. Dean turns left into this opening on the side of the road that leads to a big field of grass that looks as though it hasn't been mowed in years, broken bits of wood is sit clattered on to each other up ahead. He turns off the car and lets out a deep breath like he’s been holding it the whole ride and stares ahead

“You told me to tell you things from now on,well I’m gonna tell you things. Mainly to get your mind off of..ya know because I know nothing is going to make you feel better tonight after something like that happening.”

I nod slowly as My fingers entwine together on my lap 

“Okay.this is a start.” I say

His eyes scan the area around, not looking at me 

“Well this used to be my home.”  
I look forward at the jumbled rotten piles of wood ahead  
“Of-course not how it is now, but before this it was. Well it was a night like this and I end up getting woken up by smoke filling my room, run into the hall meeting mom and dad. Dad says to follow him close as we go get Sammy and mom rejects and says to go get Sam quickly while she grabs photo albums. My mom was always about keeping memories. Dad didn’t wanna let her go but she didn’t take no for an answer and said that she’ll meet us outside. Dad hands me Sammy from his crib and Tells me to go straight outside. I go outside, no mom or dad and I’m about to drop Sammy and run back inside before Dad comes out carrying mom, she was pretty out of it, hit her head on something and passed out. We gotta the house we live in now and everything seemed fine, she seemed normal but one morning she couldn’t breath and we took her to the hospital and that’s when we found out she had lung cancer. 

I could see the pain in his blank expression, he was hurting 

Then she dies from all of that and dad was just a shell. Became everything he always hated. Abusive, mentally and physically, drinking his life away and abandoning us.”

We both sit there for a minute, he stares at the leftover remains of the House. 

“What did she look like?”

His mouth forms into a little smile as he looks back in his memories 

“Oh mom was beautiful, had long blonde hair with pretty blue eyes. I miss her.”

I lie my hand on his shoulder and gently rub it

“I know. Thank you for telling me these things Dean.”

He nods not moving my hand from his shoulder and pulls back his seat making him lie back. I pull mine back too so we’re lying side by side looking through the windshield at the sky.


	12. Chapter 12

The next day everyone's talking about Dean's outburst on Chase. We both walk through the hallways as people glimpse at Dean and starts whispering to each other. He doesn't seem to care about everyone talking about him because he's acting like his usual self with his head held up high with pride. The video has now gone viral, everyone's on their phones watching it or with a group of people and watching it together, it's crazy how fast it spread. I played with a piece of string from my hoodie as I pass all the eyes glancing our way, my hands gather sweat from the anxiety. The door with principles office on the window opens and our principle Mr. Gallows comes out and makes eye contact with Dean before glancing at me

"Winchester, come see me in my room."

He nods towards the room. Dean looks at him as he slides his hands in his pockets, bringing his bag over his shoulder more

"Uh—can I know why?"

Mr. gallows nods again, his eyebrows dropped down to his eyes and a face that shows no humor

"You can. In my room."

Dean glances back at me before making his way into the room, the door shuts behind them.   
_______________________________

My stomachs turning, anxious from wondering what Mr. gallows was going to do to Dean because I know it was about the fight. Every student in the school was talking about it, so teachers must know too and then lastly the principle of our school. I sit in my desk in Class thinking about the feeling of being under Chase, his hot breath roaming over me, feeling those hands touch me. I slide deeper into my desk, trying to hide from the thought, no one saw that happen except Dean but thankfully Chase wasn't here today. I heard from other students that his head got beat in so much he had to go to the hospital after we left. I don't know whether to be happy about that or not all I know is that feeling that way that night, that feeling of having no control, knowing that you were right there of experiencing something that probably would've screwed you up in the head for the rest of your life, I just don't know. All I'm worried about is Dean. My hand reaches my phone out my pocket, Dean should be in class now

Cas: Dean?

Dean: yeah?

Cas: so.. what did he say to you?

Dean: don't worry about it. He just gave me a warning 

Cas: oh okay.. that's it?

Dean: yes it is Cas why you worrying so much?? 

Cas: because your my friend duh 

Dean: is that all?? ;) 

I roll my fingers through my hair and sit back in the seat. The sound of keys from the laptops click throughout the room. Dean just sent me a winky face, that was different, a good different though

Cas: you think there's another reason? 

Dean: idk, you tell me lol 

Cas: lol whatever ;)

I breathe out, okay so everything's fine. Well besides my messed up life at home, but Dean's good, so I'm good.   
____________

Like any other school day the bell ring for us to be let out. I walk quickly as my converses hit the tile floor to the parking lot, passing talkative glaring eyes looking at me.  I don't know what people think happened. Usually I'm invisible. The back of Dean's car is a few feet up front of me, I feel eyes burning into my skull as I open the car door quickly shutting it behind me. Dean asks me if I'm okay and I just nod quickly pulling my bag closer to my chest. The car jerks forward and backwards, I turn to see the school journalist Garth with his upper body on the hood of the car, looking through the windshield. Dean after all day of getting stared at and talked about finally looks flustered when someone touches his car. 

"Garth, so help me god if you don't get off my car.."

Garth quickly pulls his body from the hood and holds up his hands in defense. 

"There, I'm off. I'm off. I just wanted to talk to you about the big fight you had with Chase Richards. We'll fight is an understatement, the beating of Chase Richards."

Garth runs to the window and Dean starts rolling it up, Garth grips the window as Dean is still rolling it up, apparently not caring about what happens to Garth's fingers 

"Dean, stop."

He lets go of the button and looks at me with his hand out to Garth with the look on his face saying, "well look at this jackass!" I give him a look and lean over rolling down the window again 

"Look Garth, we gotta go, so if you want to save your fingers you might wanna back away from the window because of ya know."

I nod at Dean.

"Yeah, your probably right."  
Garth Suprisingly lets go of the window so Dean can roll it up. We follow behind the other vehicles leaving off the property

"See, sometimes you just gotta be nice."

Dean rolls his eyes, I smile and his face screws up in seriousness, I can tell he's trying not to smile. I grip at his cheeks and begin pulling them up to force his mouth into a smile. He leans more on the gas pedal going faster and I lose my grip on him falling on the floor. He laughs as I grab the seat pulling myself up

"Ha ha, you just think your so funny don't you?"

My hairs sticking up everywhere and I shuffle it back in place before Dean uses his free hand from the wheel and ruffles it back pointing everywhere. I growled and hit him on the arm, he chuckled as I once again patted my hair back down. 

"I would like to not look like I just got out of bed thank you." I say looking through the mirror 

He laughs again patting my arm

"Ya know I don't know how I've handled you for so long. Or how I will the rest of the year."

I smile showing all my white teeth looking at him, his face is stern, jaw clenched as he focuses on the road. His green eyes squint trying to see the road through the beaming sun shining down on the road before us.

Dean mentions this movie he's been wanting to see and we decide to go, but We got to stop by Dean's real quick so he can change out of his sweaty clothes from practice. He said Chase wasn't there either, and that he better not ever be. He gets out the door and starts walking inside and I say out the window jokingly 

"Hey Dean, I gotta tell you something."

"What?"

"You kinda stink." I giggle and roll up the window. He shakes his head with a smile and walks off. He comes back with Sam and a girl that looks about the same age as Sam.   
The girl hops in after Sam, her mid length wavy brown hair dangles around her face as she settles and we meet eyes as she then turns shyly towards Sam. 

"Hey Cas" sam says closing the car door, buckling up with the girl 

"Hey Sam, this your friend?" I turn around and glance at the girl, she doesn't respond

"Oh yeah—Cas, this is Eileen. Eileen, this is Cas."

I smile at her and feel better when Eileen smiles back at me after Sam introduces her. Dean explains that there was a little change in plans and now Sam and Eileen are coming with us to the movies. During the ride I look in the side mirror at how nervous Eileen looked. She keeps her eyes out the window and once in a while whispers something to Sam and he'll nod or laugh while at times trying to change the music Dean had on to something more modern instead of old rock and Dean would gripe at him about "driver picks the music." We get to the movies and Dean pays for all our tickets, I try to tell him to let me put in some of what I got but he rejects it. The theater is lit up some from the lights on the sides of the room from the previews still being played. I sit next to Dean and Sam is next to him with Eileen at the end. We all share a bag of popcorn because everything is incredibly expensive at the movies and soon the lights dim more and more when the movie starts. I have the popcorn in my lap now and Dean reached in while my hand was in it, gently grazing the top while grabbing some popcorn, eyes fixed on the movie. His hand moves in again after I dunk my hand in and he slides his fingers over my hand again before we both pull back out the bag after Sam complains about us hogging the popcorn. I see him in the corner of my eye looking at me every now and then, he looks at me again for longer than usual, I start to get nervous and turn to him

"do I got something on my face?" I ask wiping my sleeve on my cheek

He whispers no with a smirk and turns back to the screen. I lie back and see him stretch his arm behind my seat, feeling his hand lightly lay on my neck some. Every second I thought he was going to pull away and I would feel the emptiness on my neck again replacing the now warm,safe feeling I had. He stays like that the rest of the movie. 

We push out the doors leading out the movie and walk together to Dean's car. It's dark now and Dean and Sam have an argument about how the movie should've ended while me and Eileen shake our heads and laugh whenever one of them got so irritated from the others response. Dean drops Eileen off at her house, she waves smiling back at us before going to her front door. I want to ask Sam why Eileen never said anything but it was probably just because she was shy, he understood that feeling. The feeling of not knowing how to approach people or talk to them lots of times. The reason my only real friend is Dean and that I like my only friend but can't tell him. I can't tell Dean how when I look at him, I feel safe but at the same time my heart is beating twice as fast in my chest, how I smile when thinking about him and the way his eyes light up when his mouth forms into that big smile to know that at that moment he's truly happy. And when I see him, I forget everything that is wrong.

Sam gets out at The house and I begin to get out when Dean stops me and tells Sam out my window that he'll see him later and we had something to do. Sam nods and heads inside, I look at him with a confused look as he puts the car back in drive. I try asking him where we're going and he just says "you'll see." We stop at a hill going down and we hop out the car and walk down the grassy hill to a stream,  the water makes rippling noises as it goes down the way. I roll my pants legs up and let my legs dangle in the cool water. Natural springs flow down sides of part of the stream that was clay. Little Trees with blue flowers dangle from them surrounding us, I pat next to me for him to sit down.  He rolls up his pants legs and settles into the water too, leaning back on his hands. A blue flower falls from one of the trees into my lap and I pick it up to scan it.

"When did you find this place?" I ask 

"I just found it recently and thought it was cool."he replies 

"It's beautiful."  
I twirl the flower between my fingers looking at the pretty baby blue petals

"Yeah, it really is."

He looks at me, eyes fixated on mine. The moon shines white down on us lighting up our faces and I see his light green eyes sparkle in the light. I slide closer to him, bringing my hand an inch from his, his eyes trace from my eyes down to my lips. I slide my tongue over them some to wet them and he watches me before looking back up to my eyes. It feels like we got closer now, his face is a few inches from fine and I'm about to reach out to touch the side of it to feel him, to touch him. He pulls away before I can and we go back to sitting like earlier 

"I'm leaving." 

I feel my mouth go dry. And swallow feeling the once butterfly feeling in my stomach to now a feeling of nausea."

"What do you mean your leaving?"

Dean sits up and lays his hands on his legs before taking a deep breath

"When the principle called me in earlier—it wasn't a warning.. he kicked me out of the school. My uncle Bobby found out and wants me and Sam to stay with him—"

"Wait, he couldn't have just expelled you or something? This is my fault.."

I pull my hands through my hair as he quickly stops me but I pull away from him standing up. My head feels dizzy from the rush and he gets off the ground too reaching out to me.

"I don't understand, why did you get kicked out though?? Were—we're about to graduate—"

"Cas, you know this isn't the first time for this type of stuff. They've just had enough of me, said the didn't want someone like me graduating from their school, said they'll send my transcripts to my new school to graduate from there instead."

I shake my head over and over again as I walk back and forth. I feel out of control, like I can't focus. I feel a migraine coming.

"But your uncle lives up north Dean. In Delaware, I'm in Texas and I'm going to be alone without you Dean—"

"That's why I wanted you to come with me Cas. I already talked to him about it and he's fine with it but we'd have to leave in two weeks."

I suddenly feel my heart slowing down and lower my hands from my head before remembering

"I can't, my mom."

Dean shoves his hands into his pockets nodding but I can tell he's holding back before opening his mouth finally

"Cas your mom and that dick is putting you through hell! I wish you could see that.. your mom is sick Cas. She needs help."

"I know this Dean."

"Then why can't you please come with me Cas—"

I look at him feeling the wind flow through my hair. The boy upfront of me stares at me with wondering eyes full of confusion 

"Because I can't leave the people I love."   
I grab my shoes and quickly run up the hill and get on the road running down it. I hear Dean calling for me and hide as I see car lights pulling up and see that it's his. He passes down and I hitchhike on the side of the road, shoes in hand before another set of lights pull up stopping beside me. The man drops me off at my house. He was a nice old man, had a calming old country voice that soothed me from my anxiety and fear rising from inside me, the feeling of being alone. The old trunk engine clicked off and I told him thank you so much and made my way inside. No sign of John anywhere as the house was pitch black before I make it to my room and see all of my stuff on my floor. Posters ripped off the wall, my mattress flipped over, school work and books spread across one another with trash from my trash can flipped out with it. I pick up my now shattered snow globe lying on the floor, water soaking under my feet from it. My dad gave me this snow globe. I used to always wish for snow because we rarely had it so one day he gave me this snow globe that had a white tree in the middle of snowflakes that drifted through the water, but now there’s just the white tree. No snow. I feel nails grip at my arms and see my mom, her wide eyes looking back at me 

“Mom what did you do..”

I took her hand and she pulled away, scrambling at my things 

“You have to have something, anything—your—your in high school—you kids must have something—“

I grab her arms making her look at me again

“Have What mom?? What?? Drugs?? No mom I don’t have that!”

She shivers and begins to cry as she falls to the floor, I feel bad for screaming I just can’t handle this anymore. I gently pick her back up on her feet and carry her to her bed. She shivers again as I lay the cover over her folding in underneath her to keep her warm. She murmurs some more words I don’t understand before her eyes drift close as her body twitches in her sleep. I take her bangs out her face, gently wiping her mascara stained eyes

“It’s okay mom. It’s okay.” I whisper quietly to herself and I


	13. Chapter 13

A few days went by and I ignored Dean at all costs. Part of me felt selfish. It wasn't Dean's fault he was leaving, it was mine for getting him into that mess. I went and met with some unknown person I didn't know that happened to be Chase that happened to turn out that he liked me all this time and went a little crazy from it. I walked home to the same abusive drunk and the same drug addict mother. I deleted Dean's phone number, I felt like I was bad for him. I'm this thing that's putting more pain into his life. Dean deserves better so I will let him be, I'll forget about my true feelings for him. I instead focus now on keeping my grades up and getting into a college and finding out what I actually want to do in life. I think I want to do art, I draw all the time, it calms me. Before long, Dean was gone, I don't see his car at school or him but when I walk by his house there his car sits in the driveway, he actually left his car? I walk to it gliding my hand on the roof of, feeling the cold metal on my fingertips. A piece of paper is taped on the window and I take it off 

Cas,  
It will be okay. Your not messaging me back or answering my calls, so instead I’m hoping you happen to pass by my house and see this note. You don’t know how smart and talented you are Cas. You can achieve so much but think so little of yourself, stop worrying so much! This is not forever, don’t worry you will see me again, Everyone’s going to be sad seeing this beautiful face leave haha 

I shake my head with a tiny smile, so full of himself 

Anyway I’m glad I had you through these years, I’m glad I saved your ass back that day when those dick bags were messing with you. And the next and the next.. I can’t count on my hands how many times I saved your ass and YES I did save your ass! but I don’t regret none of it even if this time, I happened to have went too far which I still don’t regret because your my best friend! And that’s what friends do Cas, stick up for one another. So while I’m not seeing you, when we meet again you better be an artist! (I’ve seen your stuff, there now you know.. but your works so good Cas!) You better have your own art gallery with all those fancy people looking at them with their hands on their chins and a glass of wine in their hands talking to each other about how this drawing or painting speaks to them.(I actually don’t know how art galleries work, I’m just focusing on what’s in the movies). But anyway, don’t you put those talents to waste! See all this chick flick stuff your making me write, I wouldn’t do this with anyone I didn’t care about. Sam asked why you haven’t been over here and I just told him you were busy, he told me to ask you to help Eileen since he’s going. Sam won’t admit it, but he has a crush on her. He was broken up about leaving, I told him that night after you ran away from me. It wasn’t nice having two people mad at me in one night, but it needed to be done. I know this is for the best for Sammy, dads never there and he needs a father figure other than me. Bobby would be a great father figure for him, it’s kinda too late for me. Anyways I’m going to miss you, hell I already miss you.   
Until then,  
Dean

 

Ps: keys are on-top of the tire. She’s yours.. just for now! I know your going to need a vehicle and Bobby owns an auto shop so I’ll just use one of those cars. I know I can trust you with her. Take care of baby while I’m gone!

I take the keys, twirling the small metal ring around my finger  
________________________________

The day comes when I graduate. I wake up, put on some khakis with a white shirt and blue tie and slide the black gown over. I sweep my black hair out of my face in its place, putting on the cap on as I look at myself in the mirror. My moms comes in and rubs my shoulders, I walk out as John says some smart remark to me, I wasn’t listening and just walk past him. The leather seat makes a noise when I get in it and slide my hand on the wheel starting the car and making my way, John has my mom next to him following behind me to the ceremony. Everyone’s lined up already when I get there, I get in the line with everyone else. John grabs my moms arm and leads her away to the bleachers gripping my shoulder before he goes 

“You better be on your best behavior out there.”

His fingers dig into my shoulder and I don’t say anything back. We sit in our chairs as each name is called out, hands clap after everyone grabs their diploma and shakes hands making their way back to their seat. My name’s coming up and I look at the crowd looking down at the people walking, so many eyes. I shake the feeling away 

Castiel Novak

I stand up, and make my way past people I’ve went to school with since elementary. Chase and others sit together in the seats watching me, his face is swollen with blue painting his bruised cheeks. I quickly look away, lifting my shaking hand up to shake the man’s hand, taking my diploma from his other hand. Clapping begins again as I make my way back to my seat. My eyes trace over families with cameras flashing taking pictures of their kids, I look to John and make eye contact with him, his lips are pursed, his dark eyes stare me down.

________________________________

 

This is definitely not the ending, more chapters to come! Thank you to everyone’s who’s been reading my story and leaving feedback, I really appreciate it and I hope your enjoying it :) I know it sucks lol I’m trying my best, I don’t have this planned out, I’m just winging it. (Pretend theirs a wing emoji at the end of that sentence of winging it)


	14. Chapter 14

3 Years later 

 

It just needs one more touch.. I study my drawing real quick before gliding my pencil on it some more adding more to the theme. This was my final project and I needed it to be perfect. A pair of hands cover over my eyes as the tip of the pencil hits the paper. 

"Guess who?" The voice asks

"Um.. Queen of Moondoor?"

I hear a faint huff of laughter as the darkness is removed and my not yet done drawing comes back into vision. 

"That was so last week Cas, This weeks Harry Potter so you may call me Hermione." 

My chair is spun around and I'm met with a girl with dark wavy reddish brown hair and bangs surrounding her brown eyes. Dimples form at the edge of her mouth as she gives me a bright smile. 

"Whatever you say Charlie." I teasingly swish some hair over her face and she blows it back out. I turn back around as She gets up and sits on my desk playing with my dancing bumblebee on a spring. I begin watching it move back and forth, it's black-yellow body and spring moving together. 

"guess what today is"

I focus my attention back on the paper

"Um.. Wednesday?"   
I switch pencils out and run the edge across the paper making it darker. She groans and drops my bumblebee back where it was and turns me back around grabbing the pencil from my hand, I reach out for it but she pulls it back

"Its your birthday dude. So what do you wanna do on your special day?”

I lean my head on my arm in the arm rest and rest my eyes for a second 

"Who says I'm doing something?" I reply 

"Uh me, duh.. so I was thinking now since your 21 my good sir, you can finally drink legally-"

I raise my hand to stop her 

"Yeah but I don't drink."

"Yet." She says with a finger up  
I sigh and get up from my chair and start walking to the closet in the back of the room. The room was empty except for me and now Charlie because I often come back to the art room when I can to work on my final project.  She leans against the open door as I untie the apron and hang it up, getting my bag and going to my table, grabbing my sketch book and putting it in my bag, zipping it up tightly. I begin to put the charcoal and pencils and such back to their areas as she keeps talking.

"Oh I know, We should go to a club!"

"Oh no-"  
I pick up my bag and yank it over my right shoulder.

"I know, I know, but this will be something different." She says looking in the mirror in front of the room, readjusting her army green jacket over her Zelda shirt 

"Yeah but not such a good different, such as one: sweaty people, two: drunks, three: dancing, I suck at dancing. And last but not least: people.

I walk out the door and she follows as we make our way downstairs and out the front door of the building. She gets in front of me as I walk 

"I don't know what your so worried about, look at you Cas, I'm gay and I still find you attractive. Someone gonna fall in love with those baby blue eyes." 

I tilt my head at her 

"See! That's what I'm talking about, your adorable!"

"Ah! Stop it Charlie, you know that makes me more awkward."

"Just saying the truth."  
She gets beside me as we walk past students on the side walk and make our way away from campus.

We walk to my work, I work at a coffee shop everyday during the week whenever I can. I got to have some way to pay for school.  I stop outside the door and look at her, a light smile forms on her pale white face.

"Just promise me you'll think about it?"

I reach for the door handle as she still stands there, obviously not going anywhere until I give her an answer

"Ah- fine. I'll think about it."

She gives me a big grin and makes her way down the sidewalk. I walk inside to work. Hours later, it's finally calmed down from the afternoon rush people come for on their breaks. I sit down behind the counter and play with my phone for some time now before the bell to the door rings. I do the usual and get up going to the front desk

"Welcome to Ellen's coffee shop, what can I getcha?"

A group of guys and girl name coffees that they want and I write the orders down and make the coffees. They get their coffees, making their way to a table. Ellen comes out from the back as I lean on the table 

"Happy birthday Cas."  
I give her a smile as I get up and we both begin cleaning up.

"Thanks Ellen, how are you doing today?"

She wipes the countertop down

"Eh same old, same old. So let's get back to business, why are you here?"

She looks at me sternly as she stops wiping and leans on the counter, hand holding the rag on her hip. 

"What do you mean?"  
I go back to focusing on cleaning as her eyes burn into me, lips pursed together 

"I mean this is your birthday and instead of having fun your working your ass off over here."

I drop the rag into the back kitchen sink and the sound of laughter comes from the only table inhabited in the cafe. I hear a mention from one of the girls in the group about going out tonight. 

"You need to have more fun, and by fun I mean not binge watching shows with Charlie." 

The group of friends laugh and talk more with each-other. I try to think back to the last time I went out, none come to mind.

Ok, you might be a little right."

"Boy I know I'm right, now you get your little butt out of here and go have fun."

She grabs the broom from my hand and unties the apron from me and waits for me to move. She raises the broom and I quickly move from behind the counter away from her wrath with the broom

"Okay, Okay, Okay. I'll go have fun."

She gives me an approving look as I get my bag and leave the cafe. Maybe I should have more fun. I grab my phone from my pocket and send a text to Charlie

Cas: Okay I'm in.

Charlie: yes!!!!!!!! Watch out bitches were coming in!  
_____________________________

The sky's dark now and I hear a knock on my door and open it to meet Charlie, she walks past me briskly almost knocking me over, going to my closet. She's now dress with black skinny jeans and high top converses and a flannel shirt over a tank top 

"Now, what are you going to where.."

She scans through my closet and I look down at my blue jeans and white buttoned up shirt 

"I'm already dressed though."

She takes one look at me and quickly shakes her head bringing out a pair of clothes I quickly reject. Charlie searches more and brings out a blue buttoned up shirt and throw it at me. I find some pants and go to the bathroom to slide them on. She looks at me from my converses up to my black skinny jeans and my blue buttoned up shirt rolled up at the sleeves. Her hands ruffle through my hair making it go everywhere,  I try to stop her before she growls at me to stop

"Leave it, It looks sexy like that."

I look in the mirror at my hair   
"I look like I just got out of bed."

She smirks  
"That's the point, you got out of someone else's bed duh."

We look in the mirror and she nods in approval  
"We look hot."  
We walk out my apartment building and pass by the impala to her little red car next to it. Charlie sees me looking at the car as I close her door.

"So Why don't you ever drive that thing anyway Cas? It's a nice car."

"Oh..I just like to walk. And yeah it is."  
She starts the car. 

We stop outside and I reconsider going back home as I hear the loud music blaring from the building. People are outside smoking joints and girls walk in wearing skirts that are way too short with guys in their muscle shirts. I gulp. No Cas it's your birthday and you need to do something, your 21 for crying out loud! Charlie makes sure her doors are locked and wraps her arm around mine as we go through the front and met with a crowd of people on the inside. The music is so loud I can feel the rhythm of it beating in my chest. Charlie says something but I can't hear her  
"What?!" I scream out as loud as I can  
"I said I'm going to get us some drinks!"  
She runs off to the bar and the bartender leaves after she screams out what she wants, I see her already starting to chat up with the girl sitting at the bar next to her. I stand awkwardly against the wall as a girl grinds on a guy in front of me to the music, in the corner I see two guys making out. The guy and girl move out from in front of me finally and I look around me thinking about finding Charlie so I wouldn't look weird by myself, but now that I think about it everyone's focused on the music and dancing. My eyes trace the ceiling as the rainbow lights bounce around the dark room, I look down the room following the moving lights and meet a guy with a black leather jacket on and blue jeans. He turns his head and his sharp chiseled jaw turns with it looking at me. Eyes flicker green in the bit of light that fades across him. I stand in place as he walks over, drink in hand and one arm hugs me, My arms are by my side but then I finally hug him tightly around his back. The smell of aftershave comes from him, I breath it in loving it 

"Well Hell I wouldn't have expected You here, God Cas it's been years."

He gives me his handsome bright sideways smile, my tongue is tied and I just stare

"What's the matter? Cat gotcha tongue?"

I chuckle and shake my head smiling big, I can't help myself, I'm about to answer before Charlie runs up beside me with drinks in her hands handing me one. She looks at me about to ask what's wrong then looks ahead

"Wow hey, so what's up over here?"

"Oh Charlie this is Dean my childhood friend."  
She nods as she twirls her straw in her drink. Dean gives her a smile before putting his eyes back on mine. 

"I just have to say this but my god your hot! And that says a lot coming from a lesbian to a guy."  
I laugh and rub my shoe back and forth against the floor 

"Well thanks your not so bad yourself."  
She smiles and whispers to me "I like him" before patting us both on the shoulders 

"Alright well I'm gonna go hit up the girl I was talking to earlier."  
She walks back to the bar sipping her drink and sits down on a barstool gracefully next to a girl in a tight black dress.

"So your at a club." Dean says with a smirk

"Well I was dragged here by my friend who you just met for my birthday."

He looks baffled at himself 

"Shit I forgot about your damn birthday."

"It's okay Dean, really it's been years." I say while people shove between us.

"You wanna sit down?" He screams at me pointing toward a booth

"Yeah sure"  
We make our way to a booth and sit down across from each-other. The booths far away in the corner and the music died down a lot more back here. I sip more of my drink feeling myself drink more of it faster

"So what have you been doing?" He asks waving a girl with a platter of drinks over and grabs one, I surprisingly reach for one too, this ain't so bad I think to myself 

"Um just going to The University you know here in Texas, I'm taking an art class too, trying to work with that ya know." 

He nods in approval

"Damn that's great Cas!"  
"But Wait when did you get back? And what have you been doing?" I find myself blurting our all my questions while drinking some more

"Well at my uncle Bobby's I worked at his auto shop, fixing cars and bikes, made me some money. Then I decided I wanted to move back here, so I took a car and made my way down here."

"So did you graduate and stuff, in college or something now?"

He shakes his head  
"Nah I mean I graduated at the school up there real quick but my job was what I had for me, I missed home ya know? So made my way back here and found another job at another auto shop. Hoping to own my own shop actually one day and Sam's still up there, found a girl that he liked."

 

I smile big, my vision starts blurring together but not too bad. I find myself saying stuff I wouldn't say. My mouth wouldn't stop moving as I slur

"God I missed you Dean, I was so m-mad at my-myself for getting you into more tro-trouble and I just hated myself so much and I deleted and blocked your number so I could try to forget about everything."

Dean looks at me, his brows furrowed in worry.  
"No Cas, you didn't do anything when are you going to understand that?"

I don't answer back and lean my head on my fist 

"How's your mom?" Dean asks

"she's-she's de-dead."

He open his mouth with a sad expression and I lazily raise my hand up 

"John got arrested finally after years I guess the screaming got loud enough for a neigh-neighbor to call the cops. They check out my face, see it-it all messed up. But that wasn't enough, my-my mom was just too messed up, she was too far gone and one day I come home and-and she's just gone, laying there on the floor. Over-overdose on a bunch of stuff. But today is my birthday and we are going to be happy"

Dean pushes his hand through his hair letting out a breath

"God Cas, I'm so sorry"

I wave it Away and drink some more. My tongue is to twisted for words to form

"Cas you okay?"

My head hits the table and the next thing I know I feel myself being lifted onto my feet. My eyes drift open and I see the sidewalk underneath me, my shoes drag some across it

“Your really light Cas, you been eating?”

I lift my head up and see Dean, my arm is over his neck and he holds me up around my back. 

“Where do you live?”  
I raise a pointed finger and slur out my apartment address 

“Okay where right near there.”  
We walk past the impala and Dean glances at it  
“you took really good care of her.” 

“I couldn’t drive it, it-it was yours and-and I missed you and when-when I was in it all-all I could think about wa-was you.” I answer 

A few minutes pass and we use the elevator going up, I wrap my arms around him while digging my face into his jacket.

“still afraid of elevators huh?” He says with a chuckle

After the elevator doors open next thing I know I’m dropped on my bed and Dean is tucking the covers underneath me, I push them off and he laughs as we have a little tug o’ war with keeping the cover on me. I’m finally tired from pushing them away and give up 

“Are you warm?” He asks

I push the blanket off me once more and hold onto his arm

“Dean I really m-missed you-“

Dean starts gently pushing me back down   
“I know Cas, I missed you too.”  
I move his hand away grabbing it 

“No you don’t understand, like I-I really missed you.”

I grab a hold of his shirt collar and bring him down to me pressing my lips on his quickly before his eyes grow wide, he grabs me by the shoulders moving me back from him. 

“Cas your drunk-“

I get out over the blankets and drunkenly try to lay him on his back but he stops me. I pout and lie down on my side.

“I know, I know you don’t like me b-back. I understand.”  
I feel tears beginning to form in my eyes 

“No Cas, I do like you.. but your drunk”  
I lean up on my arms quickly 

“Then prove it! Kiss me.”

He stares at me for a second before putting a hand on the back of my neck through my hair pulling me in slowly. Our lips meet and he holds onto my loose wrist as the heat rises between us. His fingers rub my wrist gently and his lips leave Mine, my lips now feel empty and I crave for more attention from his. I get tickled as he lifts his lips from mine and goes to my ear and whispers   
“There, proved it.”  
My vision goes dark and I’m now relaxed in my soft bed, feeling the covers being tucked under me and the faint murmur of words

“Happy birthday Cas.”  
The last bit of light disappears as the sound of the door clicks shut.


	15. Chapter 15

I wake up, the sunlight reflecting through the window blinding me as I cover my eyes walking over closing the curtains. I'm still in my clothes from last night but Cas' couch is actually pretty comfortable so it wasn't so bad. Walking around the coffee table I make it to the kitchen and scavenge for cups and put some water and coffee grounds in the coffee maker, hearing the gurgle of the machine while I go to the bathroom grabbing whatever I can find to help Cas with his hangover. I've never seen him like that before, it was different. I laugh at my thought, remembering how he basically confessed to me and feeling myself blush some as I look in the mirror before walking out seeing my lips and knowing that His was there. Sliding my hands through the water, I splash it over my face and through my hair, trying to make myself look a little decent. Checking my teeth once more while grabbing some ibuprofen and heading back to the kitchen to make some bacon to help with the hangover because what can bacon not solve right? I decide to go full out making some pancakes too. After making what seems to be ten pancakes, I turn off the stove and make up a nice plate filled with bacon and pancakes with a glass of water with some coffee and ibuprofen, I make my way to the bedroom. The door squeaks some as I ease it open and see a bundle of sheets messily on the bed and a Cas spread all out over it, His black hair wildly laying over the pillow, eyes closed with a peaceful expression. I find myself starring at him at the edge of the bed with the food and drinks in my hands. He looks like an angel. The angel stirs in his sleep and I hear him groan, I quickly act like I wasn't watching him, he slowly sits up stretching his arms up, I feel the plate to make sure it wasn't hot, setting it down on his lap. Cas stops stretching, looking down at the food, blue eyes gleaming 

"You cooked?"

He asks giving me a cute little smile and takes the fork eating some of his pancake   
"Whatcha talking bout? I always cooked"

He shrugs smiling before answering with a "of-course" as he takes some bacon and nibbles on it before looking at me as I sit on the chair next to him remembering about last night, I thought he was going to talk about it but instead looks at me 

"Aren't you going to eat some?" He asks  
"Nah, I already ate." I reply 

"So about last night."

He eats some more bacon before looking at his watch, dropping the plate on the table next to the bed, hopping out from underneath the sheets and pulls a bag over his shoulder. 

"Woah what's wrong?" I ask getting up following him out to the front door, he opens it and without looking at me he says

"I'm late for class, I'll see you later" 

"But you didn't finish your—"  
The door shuts  
"Breakfast.."

I pull my hands through my hair before sitting down. He probably doesn't even remember kissing me does he? I mean he was drunk. 

_______________________________  
"Oh my god y'all kissed?!" Charlie shouts out sitting next to me during lecture. I shush her and go back to looking at my computer, feeling heat rise to my cheeks at it being said out loud.

"I knew you liked him! Ever since he showed up it was like you couldn't stop smiling and your eyes were always on him. it was kinda making me jealous." She jokes elbowing me

"Well what did he say this morning??" She asks impatiently 

"Nothing. I left before he could bring it up." I answer not looking at her but knowing she was rolling her eyes at me running away

"Look all I remember is me kissing him. I mean I'm scared Charlie, What if he was going to say something like that he was uncomfortable or something."

She looks at me shaking her head before typing more on her computer, the professors old deep voice ringing in the background of our conversation.

"Don't you think he would've left last night if he didn't like it?" She asks giving me a glance 

"No because it's Dean, and we've been friends for a long time. He wouldn't just leave like that. He made me breakfast so he could let me down easier or something."

"Awe, he made you breakfast too? Ugh I'm so jealous." She says sweetly

"And you don't know that Cas. Your making observations that you really don't know are true. I've seen the way he was looking at you last night. He likes you Cas."

I shake my head in doubt and decide to change the subject

"About last night, where did you go anyway?" I ask 

"Oh just the same old.." she says and then winks at me

"The Girl at the bar?" I ask 

"Maybe.." she says with a sly smile

"I'll take that as a yes."   
Her mouth forms into a big smile. Oh no I say.

"You know what would be a good idea? after you finally get with Dean me and my maybe girlfriend and you and your pretty boy have a double date."

I lean my head in my hands while she repeatedly nods her head, already planning everything out. 

After the lecture we make our way to lunch. She gets a burger that's bigger than her face and I get a salad. She gives me a look when I began munching on my salad and I groan and complain how she's acting just like Dean. The blurry image of me grabbing Dean and kissing him, feeling his lips pulled to mine, remembering the warm-ness of it all makes my cheeks turn a light pink color. We eat while Charlie complains about her classes and how she's one of the only few girls majoring in computer engineering at college, I nod as she talks and give looks while I listen but all I can think about is that Kiss, it's crazy.  

"Anyway enough rambling for me.. Cas can I ask you something?"

I sip on my drink and nod

"Do you love Dean?"

I start coughing hard almost spitting out my drink, my face is red from coughing and eyes pop out a dark blue as I grab a napkin wiping my mouth.

"Why are you asking that?"

She shrugs  
"I don't know.. it's just seems more than just a like-like relationship. Just seems like you love him. You've been quiet this whole time and I know that's because of seeing him again." She chuckles 

I wipe my hands and put the napkin and other trash into my leftover salad and get up, pushing my chair into the table. 

"Oh hey I should get home, got some work that needs to be done."

She nods and grabs her bag, walking with me outside the diner  
"I didn't make you uncomfortable did I?" She says looking worriedly   
"Oh no dont worry about it, I just really got stuff that's already past do."  
"Okay good and yeah I feel ya"  
Charlie lightly punches me in the arm before hugging me as we go opposite directions.

I get home to an empty apartment, dropping my keys on the table I made my way to make some coffee. I really did have work that needs to be done so that was true but also did get nervous after having Love and Dean being put together. Not that the thought hasn't come to mind, I guess I kind of just pushed it away out of fear or maybe I just don't really know what love is. After some time of typing and writing on whatever work that needed to be done, my back started aching from all of it and I tried watching tv. Sighing, I lied back against the couch, remote in hand before I jump when my phone rings. It says Dean and I remember him having a new phone and me putting it in, I answer it

"Hello?"    
The sound of some drill or such is in the background   
"Hey Cas, what's up?"  
I look down at the now books and paper thrown together at my side   
"Uh not much just doing some school work  
"Oh okay well I was gonna ask if you wanted to come to my place and pig out on a pizza I'm getting after work while binge watching movies."

The Line is silent for a second with just the sound of car things going on in Dean's background.  

"C'mon you know you wanna."  
"Alright, alright, I'm kinda getting tired of writing this essay anyway. When do I come over?"

He sounds like he's in a rush now   
"I get off in 10 minutes, and picking up a pizza after work. 

"Hey I'll just get the pizza if you want?" I ask

"Nah it's okay I got it-"  
"Dean just let me get it, you sound exhausted."  
"Well okay, get extra cheese. See ya later—  
Oh and Cas? Don't forget pie."  
I laugh  
"Dean you know this, I never forget the pie, by the way I need to know where you live."  
"I swear it's happened before and I'll text it too you now."  
The phone hangs up and I push the kiss away from my head, itleast for tonight so I can act normal. We already acted normal, like nothings happened, like he wasn't gone for three years.I miss Dean, yeah I like him but I miss him as a friend too and I'm just dying to get away from this work. I get up, changing out of my sweats.

I decide to drive Dean's car to give it back to him, I'm sure he wants it back, he loved or actually loves that car. Following past apartment buildings and stores, I finally find his and use the elevator to go to his floor, pizza box in one hand and bag with pie and beers in other. I personally don't care for beer but I know Dean likes it. Getting out the elevator, I already feel my nerves acting up, maybe he forgot all about it and I got nothing to worry about, right? Yeah, I'm sure that's it. If he hated me or something he wouldn't have invited me over. Knocking on the door, a distant "hold on!" Is shouted, a minute or so passes before The door opens revealing a Dean with a towel around his waist, holding the door open while he rubs another towel through his short hair, some water droplets fall over his chest and his muscles flex as he raises them wiping his face. Okay this isn't going to be as easy as I thought, I think to myself as I say hey awkwardly and raise the food and drinks. Dean smiles and grabs the stuff making his way inside and I stand there before he looks behind him  
"What are you waiting for? Come on"  
I nod and go in closing the door. His apartment is bigger than mine and nicer, I think as I follow him to the kitchen table setting myself in a chair. I jingle the keys and he looks at me happily but quickly turns to a sad expression   
“You don’t want her?”  
“It’s not that Dean, it’s your car and you love it. Besides I like to walk.”  
He hesitates but nods  
"Let me go put something on, go ahead and put whatever you want on"  
He leaves and I grab on the end of my sleeves on my shirt covering my hands up in warmness as I sit on the floor and look through the movies. Flipping through I actually see some Romance and smile, I couldn't ever see Dean having romance movies. I remember Dean always watching The Untouchables, so grab that. He scares me after I put it in  
"You pick one?"  
I nod, feeling more in control when Dean's actually in clothes now. He rubs his hands as if he's getting ready to do something life-threatening and reaches for the food. Giving me a cute smile when he sees the Cherry pie. I giggle  
"You haven't changed a bit have you?" I say looking for the plates before he waves me off and grabs two for both of us.   
"Is that a bad thing?"  
I shake my head going to the couch with him as he carries the pizza and pie container. The movie starts and it feels like I’m in high school again, sitting in that movie theater, feeling Dean right next to me but instead of eating popcorn, we eat pie and pizza. My eyes glance at Dean every now and then, I love watching his face light up. His green eyes full of joy like a kid opening Christmas presents on Christmas Day,but at the same time in concentration and his pink lips form into a grin. I find myself starring   
“Why are you staring at me? Food on my face?” He rubs his face   
“Oh no just—nothing”

I slightly shiver and he stops me when I see him go in front of me, but then just grabbing a blanket from behind me and spreading it out on me. He stops and looks at me after he lays it on me and I find myself looking back, not being able to leave from this Forrest filled with green apple and green grass, filled with green nature. His soft lips gently go on mine before I know it and I relish the taste for a moment before pulling away  
“Wait-What are we doing?”  
He looks at me confused, I open my mouth to protest again before he hushes me and puts a finger to my lips stopping them  
“Cas. Just go with it.”


	16. Chapter 16

Dean’s lips press against mine once again while pressing me down gently on the couch and getting over me. Dean's hands grab my hips, gently caressing them there while aimlessly making his way up my sides through my shirt. He moves his mouth on my neck, giving me soft kisses, his little bit of beard tickling me as every kiss plucks me. He lifts up to take his shirt off, his chest bumping as he flex his muscles when forcefully throwing his shirt down and quickly moving back down to me unbuttoning my shirt and kissing down my chest each buttons that gets undone and leaves me shirt open. He slides his hands down my pants and grabs my hips as he kisses down my body, my hands begin to fumble through his hair feeling every inch above my waist getting praised. I pull my hands from his hair and he lifts up to watch my hand slide down his tan stomach, feeling him under my fingertips and grab the top of his sweatpants. Dean looks up and gives me a devilish grin before winking and pulling my hand back and slowly leading his hand down my stomach and unbuttons my pants leaving me to gasp as he slides his hands in them and through my boxers,grabbing my butt. "You don't know how bad I wanted to do that." He says as he pulls down my pants leaving me in just my blue boxers and unbuttoned shirt, he bends down to kiss me again and grabs my crotch area surprising me, I moan in the kiss and see him make a smile knowing what he did. He stops and goes down to glide his lips down my stomach and stopping at my area "lets see what your hiding from me" he grabs the edges sliding my boxers down while making eye contact, my face is probably flushed red and i start feeling a little embarrassed before he stops and lightly touches my cheek,”We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to— I grab his hand and press it to my lips kissing it,”as long as it’s you, I’m okay.” He goes up and kisses my cheek and under my Ear and his hand grabs my dick making me moan against his mouth as he kisses me and moves his hand back and forth slowly as he kisses me deeply taking my breath away. Not being able to control myself, I feel this hidden lustful desire come out, I now forcefully control the kiss and push my hand into his sweats and rubbing him on the inside of them. Deans mouth lets go of me for a minute and a deep groan and moan comes out between his slightly open mouth,”oh god..”He pants as he gently rubs my dick. now having his mouth to my ear,feeling his warm breath against my neck between his breaths. I find myself smirking and whisper back in my breaths of pleasure,”do you like this?” I fasten my pace on his dick seeing his eyes now look at me as we make eye contact as we both jerk each other off so close to each other. Seeing his green eyes look at me, I go faster and faster and he ends up leaving my dick alone from the pleasure and grips onto the edges of the couch so hard leaving crevices in it as he bites his lip moaning,”shit Cas—“ I grab one hand onto his arm holding onto the couch as I jerk him off into pleasure and he lifts his head back as he comes out on my chest. It takes a minute for him to settle down and look down at me, shock forms on the beautiful face on top of me.” What? Thought I couldn’t do it?” I ask with a little smirk, feeling confident. He roughly grabs my cock and I gasp in surprise. “No.. it’s your turn now.” He lowers down and before I realize it he swipes his tongue up my dick slowly and I arch my back up some from the sudden slowness and feeling I’m not used to. Then keeps his tongue on the tip for a minute swirling it around it, my hands travel down to his head, fingers through his hair as he lowers his mouth down on it and I arch my back all the way up from excitement, making a noise I’ve never made before. He slurps his mouth off ,”oh I like that noise. I wanna hear it more often.” And then quickly lowers back down making me gasp again and moan as he slowly drags his lips as far down as he can do and feeling him slyly swirl his tongue around it, I hold onto his hair as he begins to go up and down on me before lifting his mouth up from it and sucks on my neck hard as he grips it in his hands and jerks it slow and I feel like I’m about to go mad and grit my teeth,”Dean that isn’t funny.” He makes a devilish smile before quickening his hand up and down my dick as we kiss and I unknowingly lightly thrust into his palm before moaning loudly after letting go of his mouth and releasing against his stomach and my head falls back against the pillow and then look up to find him starring at me,”I think I love you.” He says quietly. My eyes grow a little wider and I stare back at him.” What did you say?” Dean grabs the side of my face and gently places his lips on mine and letting go,” I said that I love you Cas. I’ve always loved you.” I smile and wrap my arms around his neck before pulling him back in for a deep, meaningful kiss and press my head against his as we gaze into each-others eyes, green meet blue.  
“I love you too Dean.”

 


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